Mitten Centric Parenting

Here's the original 19th Century poem:

The three little kittens they lost their mittens,
And they began to cry,
Oh, mother dear, we sadly fear
Our mittens we have lost
What? Lost your mittens, you naughty kittens!
Then you shall have no pie.
Mee-ow, mee-ow, mee-ow.
We shall have no pie.
Our mittens we have lost.

The three little kittens they found their mittens,
And they began to smile,
Oh, mother dear, see here, see here,
Our mittens we have found
What? Found your mittens, you good little kittens,
And you shall have some pie.
Mee-ow, mee-ow, mee-ow.
We shall have some pie.
Let us have some pie.

The three little kittens put on their mittens,
And soon ate up the pie;
Oh, mother dear, we greatly fear
Our mittens we have soiled
What? Soiled your mittens, you naughty kittens!
Then they began to sigh,
Mee-ow, mee-ow, mee-ow.
Our mittens we have soiled.
Then they began to sigh.

The three little kittens they washed their mittens,
And hung them out to dry;
Oh! mother dear, look here,look here,
Our mittens we have washed
What? Washed your mittens, you good little kittens,
But I smell a rat close by.
Mee-ow, mee-ow, mee-ow.
We smell a rat close by.
Let's all have some pie.

Mother Goose

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In this poem, the parental figure uses mittens as the primary measure of her offspring. If the condition of the mittens are well kept, the offspring gets a reward. But if the mittens are not well kept, punishments are doled out.

In this situation, since parenting turns on the condition of the mittens, the kittens will likely learn to keep their mittens safe and hidden in order to garner favour with mother.

Maybe this was a particular fad of the time period. Maybe these were an important new innovation of mitten manufacture. Perhaps a comparable situation would be for the parental figure in the late 1990s to assess their offspring by the condition of their Ty Warner Beanie Babies Stuffed toy collection.

For instance, it might be tempting to play with these toys for a while, but once they get worn or ripped, the parental figure will have something to say about it, especially for the rare beanies.

Hopefully, the children will figure out that playing with these things are more trouble than their worth, literally. At least until the fad plays out and their mother moves on to another diversion.