Processing failures

I finally decided to see if Adobe Lightroom will run on my laptop as I am tired of not being able to process my photos and I have to say - I need a new laptop. While it is "usable", the process or is struggling heavily under the load which is no surprise considering it struggles under normal circumstances. One day when Steem does something more than it is, I might take a little and hook myself up with a decent laptop that can handle some more intensive usage.

For now though, I will have to make do with the limitations of this one and hope it doesn't burn out in the mean time. I have a desktop that hasn't been powered up in a few months because it sits in my daughter's room and I have no time after work to get on it to edit anything. I used to be able to do it as I worked from home during the day but home is just a place to sleep these days.

While not ideal, I am able to select a photo or two and slowly work on them it seems which means I can return some of the color washed out from RAW and play around a little with the contrasts to make them slightly more appealing than they are straight out of the camera. These ones are a few I played with over the last couple hours to see what was going on but most of the time I was waiting for the laptop to catch up.

I took a monthly subscription for Lightroom to test if it would work and to then see how much I use it. The package came with Photoshop also but I can't imagine the laptop I currently have handling that as it tends to be a bit more resource hungry. Everything is resource hungry at the moment it seems and I am for the first time in a while, feeling a little under the weather and in need of some rest. At the moment, Steem is my resting time and I don't have enough time to put in the way I would like.

Life often gets in the way of plans made and while my plan originally was to post less this year and do more in other areas, the additional IRL work I am doing now on top of everything else has changed the course a bit. Writing is still necessary for me because not only do I want to keep my earnings ticking over, the act is cathartic and healing in nature and while it might not replace sleep or food, it does energize me. After writing a little, my mind is calmer, my body more relaxed, my mood better.

Currently, support has slowed which has slowed the tick of Steem, but I am still finding ways to use some disposable income to buy in when I can. It might not be much but it is something. For me, support has always ebbed and flowed and I have become accustomed to it as sometimes people connect with my work, sometimes they don't. I am not going to chase as I believe that the best way forward is to do the best we can and if that is not enough, so be it.

Too many people here feel that once they have some support, they are entitled to it forever and when they lose it, they complain and throw a hissy fit, start posting crap or leave altogether, arms waving and screaming (they come back at the next bullrun of course - some the next week). I try to have a little more maturity and grace than that... I hope. I have found on Steem the single biggest issue people have is that they hold unrealistic expectation about their experience here and when their desires go unmet, rather than adapting to the current environment and working toward a better future they lay blame and rant and rave. That is their choice of course, everyone is free on Steem.

My approach is essentially just to remain consistent which means, keep exploring the world in which I live, the possibilities that may arise, the people I encounter and what it all tells me about the world and, write. As said, it is cathartic because not only do I get my thoughts out, it creates the space for me to process my own experience and hopefully in so doing, help others along their journey too in some way. Shared experiences through these posts are like travelling together.

Value comes in many forms for me and while I want Steem to do well, even the idea of doing well is based on perspective. Is it the price of the coin, the ability to give people an open voice or, the possibilities it delivers for those who choose to take the responsibility for their own experience. I try to take the opportunity to invest in my future and the future of others and hope that the investments made now will help satisfy many use cases for Steem in the future, for many people.

I have expectations too of course - I expect certain things from myself.
I can live with my own failures because after so many, I have got used to the feeling of them.

I do hope my laptop doesn't fail though.

Taraz
[ a Steem original ]