Thank you so much for your feedback!!
It means much to me!
The same thing: I wanted to go till the end, but should I be egoistic and fight proving something to myself if I have risk to my family safety?.. I feel like a piece of shit, but I have to take their rules of the game in this situation.. The way out is living in my own private house, and now we try our best to earn money for it, though it is so expensive now.. But I am tired to live in touch with all this life shit, so it is great motivation:)