Slow and steady wins the race.. Memoirs of a science teacher

So..... today was unique...as a person who accepted their role as a piece of furniture in the science department i was today thrust in to the limelight and the heady intoxication of being put in charge.

My head of departments mother in law has unfortunately burnt her house down the night before and my manager couldn't stop crying as she knew this meant her idyllic life with her fiance was about to come crashing down around her ears. The pitter patter of size nine feet taking up a large portion of their humble abode along with (and I quote) "she f***King stinks" which obviously doesn't help. Her rant about having to sleep with the bedroom door shut and the indignation of the Sky Q having to leave the kitchen to go into the freshly homeless woman's room as just too much.

Enough about her though.

Im not going to lie the power felt good. I now have the air of a man who has seen things, the nonchalance that comes with knowing you're the big fish (until a real manager turns up) and obviously the humility to know I was not always, but mostly always, right. I was even bestowed with a walk talky....

What can I say? The air smells a little sweeter up here.

I can honestly say as well that my classes clearly picked up on my new found power, as they sat back in obvious awe at my description of covalent bonds, my mastery of hormonal control and my genius at wrestling with their misconceptions. The only slight blip was when a pupil told me I was ten years older than their mother, but, it takes more than a single knock to chop down this mighty oak.

Hmmmmmmm, should I pluck the grey out of my beard or allow the badger effect to spread? Answers on a postcard.