I was almost at the end of the piece, I could see the bottom of the page and my comment had already formed in my mind. That happens a lot, it is an involuntary response when I read something that resonates, inspires or intrigues me.
It WAS going to be...
Awww what a beautiful, quaint piece, so innocent and uplifting, timeless as though from a bygone era of a much simpler time. Hugely enjoyable, left me with a smile on my face and a slightly lighter heart...
Then came the sucker-punch!
Skillfully built up to, I did NOT see it coming, expertly done, ya got me.
BUT
I feared something in the timbre of the closing two lines felt like there was a glint of reality that I fear we may both be familiar with, from long, long ago.
I hope I am reading too much in to the tale...
There was a lot of ground covered in those 30 sentences, well done on weaving such a fine tale with such limited literary resources.
Oh and before I forget, wishing you and yours a magnificent 2020 from me and mine :)
What a lovely comment! I'm delighted you liked the story but not that you found a certain familiar reality in it. As you say, it was a long, long time ago. These days the kids would likely just call Childline or divorce their parents:)
It's sure good to see you back on Steemit and I wish you too a fine New Year.
#Love your comment @stevenwood and the progression of your thoughts (mirroring my own).
I was soooo captivated by these kids: at age 4, Síle could already read well and charm many the ha'penny from a soft-hearted adult and Seán, 3 years older, earns money doing odd jobs. These are like the Boxcar Kids. These are the world's best children!!! And then... then.... omg.... sucker punch is right. And like like stevenwood, I felt a ring of authenticity here. Please don't let this be a true story, but even if it didn't happen to you, it's happened to kids the world over... if not a drunken parent, a thieving cousin... No good deed goes unpunished**... and so we hope karma (or an afterlife) come to kick ^ss when good little children are passed over and the rewards go the wicked. -_-
Awesome story!
#LOVE it!!!!!