Im sorry atheistcat, depression is no fun. I went through a bout of it years ago. Did you grow up Catholic? God doesn't always "talk" the way that we would expect. And He loves you, is not ignoring you. Best thing I have today is, sometimes we ask God for a cake. He gives us, eggs, bread, sugar, flour, oil. And we get upset that he didn't bring us a cake. Keep your head up! It will get better. :)