confession story. #18

Female

It was early morning. Weather was cold, seems romantic. As usual I was in my bed scrolling the newfeed. Checking his profile, looking at his photos. And thinking what did I do so that he left me without any reason. That morning was little bit different, like some good is going to happen with me. As usual I woke up late, and I started to prepare for lunch. It's was almost 11 am. I heard someone knocking the door. I went to open the door, and what I saw was out of my mind.
Oh my God, it was him, infront of me. I was shocked, tears started rolling down, hands were shaking. Thoughts came in my mind " he said he don't wanna be with me, don't wanna see me anymore, then why is he here? " Too many thoughts came. "How are you?" He asked.
My heart was beating fast, like it will come out right now. I was busy in watching him that I didn't hear what he said. " Are you still angry with me?" He asked me again. This time I replied " Even though I'm angry or no, it doesn't matter to you any more. " But my heart wanted to say I won't get angry even you break my heart for thousand times. "Sorry" he said with a guilty face. " I don't know what I was doing that time. I became crazy, couldn't think anything. I just thought about myself, I became selfish. I was trying to run away from everything. Even with you."
I cried. I couldn't help myself. I was broken, hurt but also I was happy to see him. Happy that he realized his mistake. I love him alot. As soon I saw him, I wanted to hug him tightly and never let go. " You don't know how I feel when you stop talking with me, when you ignore me. My heart was broken into pieces. The guy who loved me more than I do, was the one who didn't want to talk. It's hard to fix my scars. Only I know how I spend all this days and nights." I show him my all anger. He cried, his face shows, he was feeling guilty for what he did. " I'm really sorry baby. I was not in my mind. I came back to apologise. I know what I have done is unforgivable, but I really want you back in my life. I wanna get marry with you. While i wake up in the morning, i wish to see your face first and the last at night. This time I swear you will not get hurt, I won't repeat the same mistake."
I slapped him, hit him, spit out all my anger to him. Then I hugged him and kissed him on his forehead. Tears were still rolling down. " I loved you before, I love you now and I will still be loving you till my last breath. I'm not gonna give up on you. I love you alot. " I hugged him tightly and said. " Love you too baby, and sorry for all. " He said crying.
He kissed me on my forehead and said " Thank you so much for loving me this much. I promise to give all the happiness to you. "
I was so happy that I got him back. Now I won't leave him alone, he won't be getting feeling of loneliness.
Suddenly....... something fell down, some loud noise came. And I wake up. My baby (my baby dog) was barking cause she wanted to pee. Then I realized, damn it was a dream. All my dreams get shattered on the floor. Tears rolled out.
If it was a dream I wish not to wake up. I wish to live my life on that dream. But it's not possible. And also wishing him to come back in my life but it's also just a dream. But staying in a hope which will never come true will make you fall in every step of your life. So trying to be happy, that noone will know my pain.