Back to school

 Teacher: What is the purpose of having school?
Student: Without school there wouldn't be a reason for holidays and summer vacation. 

 

A teacher was asked to  fill out a special questionnaire. One question said, "Give two reasons  for entering the teaching profession." The teacher wrote: "July and  August." 

 

Physics Teacher: Isaac  Newton was sitting under a tree when an apple fell on his head and he  discovered gravity. Isn't that wonderful? Student: Yes sir, if he had been sitting in class looking at books like  us, he wouldn't have discovered anything.   

 Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray!
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon. 

 A good teacher, like a good entertainer, first must hold his audience's attention. Then he can teach his lesson 

 Mom: What did you do at school today?
Tom: We did a guessing game.
Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam.
Tom: That’s right! 

 Kate: Why was school easier for cave people?
Jim: Why?
Kate: Because there was no history to study! 

 The human brain is special.  It starts working as soon as you get up and it doesn't stop until you get to school. 

 

Father: Tell me how school went today. How do you like it? Billy: It's hard to like a place that's haunted, dad. Father: Haunted?! What do you mean? Billy: It's that new teacher of mine... she keeps talking about the school spirit.