Worst case scenario. This:

In which case we are all screwed anyways and should worry more about food and bullets to fight the zombies...

Best case scenario. This:

You will be almost 99% guaranteed to become a multimillionaire by owning the top coins the market finally ends up favoring.

3 word summary: Invest, Diversify, HODL

But, “introduce any crazy coin name here” is so great...

Too many coins trying to reinvent the wheel. The creative solution-driven coins (mostly platform or privacy/security focused) end up in the top of the charts anyway.

I would add: Do some research before investing [in ICO's especially]. What is Unique about it? Peruse the White Paper. Does it solve a problem?

Excellent advice @cryptoeagle. Passive, long-term investments are boring and hard. But nothing worth doing is easy.