Living with PTSD

in #blog7 years ago

Life with PTSD is hard, frustrating, and we'll stressful. Sometimes it creates challenges out of absolutely nothing. And at times can literally be crippling. I'm not saying it's the same for everyone. There are different forms of PTSD. Mine is results of multiple domestic violence encounters, my daughter's death due to domestic violence, and then surviving an F5 tornado in Joplin Missouri after driving into it with my son in the car with me.
Not all people who have PTSD have been to war. And I almost couldn't imagine living life on that spectrum. But none the. Less living with PTSD of any level is hard. Sometimes it takes me literally hours to convince myself to go get food. I used to not leave my house and if I did I waited til a specific time when I knew this lady worked at the gas station down the street from me. I went in there with my jaw wired shut and she had the patience to hear me speak and she actually showed she cared and would talk to me and let me know it was safe to come when she was working.
Having that option probably saved my life. I was going crazy never leaving or seeing people. Not to mention 6 months of crushing pain pills and drinking it in tea. And making me completely depressed taking them. @dragons actually was one of the absolute few people who would visit me. And help keep me sane. I eventually moved away to Colorado and managed to retrain myself to believe people weren't all bad. (smoking mass amounts of weed helped) but literally I think I would still be sitting alone at home if it weren't for moving away from Missouri and getting away from the same surroundings and people.
Smoking weed has absolutely helped me be a normal functioning person. And alot of cognitive behavioral therapy and retraining myself. Also focusing on art has helped me have positive things to do with positive outcome. I'm writing this article to let those of you know that no matter what life hands you or what some other human being decides to do to you. There is still life after it all. You are a strong person for just walking out the door and going to work even when you don't believe in anything anymore. Keeping in motion is what saves us from self destruction. If you feel defeated talk to someone. Push yourself to do small things like going to a park with a trusted friend. But don't ever give up. Don't let someone else take that power, sparkle, life from you.

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Have you tried EMDR? If you find a therapist skilled in its use, its the gold standard. There are studies with functional MRIs that show changes in the brain after treatment. EMDR doesn't make you forget, it reduces the emotional pain associated with PTSD.

I have not. But I am at a point with my PTSD that I don't have issues doing anything anymore. I have bad days and good days but it also is mainly based off my anxiety. And I've drained any financial ability to actually see another Dr.

Too bad the early folks you saw didn't think of the best treatment instead of just good treatment. Take care of yourself. EMDR.com has a list of practitioners; some may work with you on payment. Good success! You