These RC's are doing my head in!!!...comedyopenmic #39

A meeting of the intelligentsia socially awkward geeky techy people. (who understand everything).

QUESTION:

How are we going to build up our social media platform, for mass adoption?

People present .
Echo chamber The witnesses.

'Simple Simon' :
I think if we make it like, really difficult to post and interact on here, people will come flocking to us.

'Naive Nigel' :
That's a great idea, Simes, it'll be both a media platform and exclusive. People like exclusive. The more difficult we make it, the bigger it will grow!
Brilliant concept Simon! You're like, really amazing.

Simple Simon stops tweeting and looks up.

Simple Simon:
Yeah, it just, like, came to me, like, when I was meditating. All my best ideas come to me when I have a whiff of sandalwood up my nose.

Naive Nigel:
That's truly rad, Simon, rad, man.

Boring Barry:
Guys, I don't know if you've noticed, but we are shedding users, and our retention rates are abysmal, and if you compare us to the growth of Minds...

The rest of the board:
OH Shut it Barry! You just don't understand the concept.

Boring Barry:
But neither do our bloody users! That's my point.
Why are we making it harder for them to join, use, post, and and interact?
People can't interact.
The RC's are stripping them of their ability to speak. The more you interact, the more you get penalized!
It's doing people heads in!

Simple Simon:
They could just put more money in, you do know that right?

Boring Barry:
But they don't want to put money in, they want a social media platform to connect to people. Like facebook, but better.

Simple Simon:
And they don't want to pay for it? Why not? Maybe this platform isn't for them then, they can fuck off..Losers!

The rest of the board:
Stoopid Barry, always being negative. It's about the concept man, the concept.

Simple Simon:
Build it , and they will come, Barry, build it and they will come.
'Field of dreams' was so deep, and on so many different levels...Total classic, man.

Barry looks down, dejected, never thinking his 25 years in big business would be defeated by a group of geeks.

Simple Simon:
Onto to the second item of today:
Where shall we have our next Steemfest?
It's important that we get our message out there to our echo chamber faithful users.

Boring Barry:
If we bloody well carry on like this the entire steemit community will be at steemfest next year . Every single one of 'em..

Naive Nigel:
Inclusive Barry, that's what it's all about mate, being inclusive.
We'll be, like one big small happy family, and we'll all finally have the friends that we never had growing up 'cos we were glued to our comp screens...
Our new family.

Boring Barry :
But that's NOT going to grow the platform !!

The rest of the board:
That's OK, Barry, don't worry - We'll all have our new friends and family then , what else could you ask for..?

Barry stands up, and jumps out through the glass window on the 7th floor , screaming.....

Simple Simon:
That! That, is like just, like so uncool. Bad vibes man, bad vibes..

Naive Nigel:
He was never really part of the steemit family anyway,.... Now, where are we having the next Steemfest?...

Someone screams loudly.

Not at Barry jumping through the window, they've just been looking down at their Tablet, and look up excitedly...

Geeky Gina:
Oh...my......god....I mean like, literally....OMG to the max, guys... We have night toggle mode!
Just like, you know, how cool is that?

I nominate Barry (deceased, he doesn't count)
@blanchy because he's short -- He has further to fall.

and @abigail-dantes, 'cos she's buggered off, and it might get her attention.