Perfectionism

in #blog6 years ago

Here are some notes about perfectionism that came into my mind today.

  • Perfectionism may bring harm than good.
    I think the idea to wait for the right moment, the proper exact measurement and situation only complicate our life. Often, a task is created to be simple and straight-forward. However, in the mind of a perfectionist, they want everything to be their way and flawless. The harsh reality is, we learn as we make mistake. A perfectionist must understand that they don't know it all. They can't know it all. It is fine if you do poorly in something that is not your field of expertise.

  • Remember a great idea is meaningless if it can't be implemented.
    Perfectionism often leave a great idea to be just idea. The only way to make an idea become reality is that we must try to implement it with limitations. Of course there will be challenges and limitations. Hence, doing is a great way to understand the flaws in our idea and to fix it according to limitations.

  • Perfectionism hinder us from leveling up.
    This point resonates with the previous one. Because we are too busy thinking about limitations, challenges, and ideas; we forget to try it. Hence, we won't know the fallacy we have about our ideas. As result, we won't know where to fix our mistake or even learn something new. By doing, we open more doors to more information.

  • It is also detrimental to our well-being.
    Perfectionism leads to self-critical, anxiety, and stress which aren't healthy for our state of mind. As a perfectionist, I understand how I worry so much of things I said or do to others. I worry a lot if my ideas suck. However, when I push myself to execute it, it has unexplored potentials that can be great. Perfectionism hinders me from being confident. It holds me back from expressing my thoughts, doing my ideas and leveling up.No wonder I've been stuck and learning a little all this year. That was because I worry so much about being perfect than being able to do it. I was afraid to make mistakes while making mistake is acceptable.

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I have always not been a perfectionist, and have found fault in it. Either extreme is not good. I used to feel everything I did was mediocre, but didn't have the drive to do better, and would have liked to be an over-achiever. Now that I have a husband and a son that are perfectionists, and it takes forever for them to accomplish anything, I see the importance of balance.

The physiology of us plays a big role in how we feel and act as well. Hormones definitely have a bit of a hand in how much interest I have in effort, depending on the time of the month. The first half being so much more enthusiastic. I am taking a leap and assuming you are a woman :)

That's interesting perspective to have especially it's relation to hormones. I agree with you, it often plays role as well. Your son and husband are lucky, I don't have someone to remind me when I am being perfectionist. I wonder what are the cause of their perfectionism. Mine was because some people in my life put me on pedestal since I was a little and expected to never make mistakes at all.

The pedestal perfectionist seems like the most common one. I think there is a genetic predisposition to that personality type for some folks. My husband never had any stringent expectations put on him, he has just always been this way. I guess we all lean a certain way and need to correct it with free will.

I thought it was just environmental but that's something new! do you have tips to lessen perfectionism behavior? it sucks being stuck in the same loop while I know, if I just execute my ideas, great things might come, either lesson or rewards.

I am definitely still trying to figure it out too. Mainly I am just trying to instill in my son (who is only 5) in subtle ways that we cannot control most things in life. That is how I see perfectionism - as a control issue. Obsessional OCD runs in my family, which is definitely a thought process revolving around fearing the inability to control/protect what you most love. The only solution is to accept that nothing can be controlled 100 percent. The most important thing I have learned about it all is that we choose how we react, and largely how we feel. Sorry, not very helpful, but you are clearly a good thinker so I am sure you will break the cycle :)

The only solution is to accept that nothing can be controlled 100 percent.

That's actually very helpful. I wish the best for your son, he'd sure grow up just fine :)

Tienes mucha razón el perfeccionismo termina paralizando tu vida por miedo al fracaso, miedo al juicio, miedo a perder, etcétera, si todo no se da de acuerdo a lo que uno considera adecuado. creo es uno de mis problemas, y cuando ves en tu pasado, la cantidad de cosas que no viviste o experimentaste, por que según tu criterio no era perfecto, llega el arrepentimiento y la tristeza.