I wish I had an Omi-level comment for this. But two shorter things -
- Dealing with all of this is a skill that he will be developing intensely for his entire life. Like any other skill, nobody gets to be all that good at it at nine. But that doesn't mean he won't be great at it at 40.
- Isaac Newton would totally have eaten Tide Pods.
The irony of #2 makes me laugh. You're probably right.