30 Second Book Reviews That Are Outside the Cube
Recently, I was asked to come up with six book reviews that I could give verbally in 30 seconds or less. It's all part of a holiday bookstore event, wherein the reviewers have half a minute to give their review or get yanked off the stage like a failed contestant on the Gong Show. Here are my 30 second reviews.
One of the books I came up with was a little hard cover edition of Agatha Christie's Murder on the Orient Express. The book was good; the review, short and sweet, but it came out to longer than 30 seconds. Timing myself, I ended with 37 seconds and some change. I'm still tempted to use it.
Agatha Christie's Murder on the Orient Express for Parents & Grandparents
This book was written in 1934, but it remains timeless. It's main character is a private investigator who has two things going for him: One- he's brilliant at solving mysteries, two- his mustache. When there's a murder on this train crossing Europe, Hercule Poirot is the guy on the case.
The reason this is the perfect book for your parents or grandparents, is that Christie is great with character development and because of it, this book feels timeless. Also, this edition is pocket sized, low priced, and has a classic hard cover design that goes great on any shelf.
The next book on my list was Cinemaps. It's a book of maps of all your favorite movies. It's not easy giving a review of this book without taking the time to show someone the pages, but I don't tend to do things the easy way.
Cinemaps by Andrew DeGraff for In-Laws & Co-Workers
This is the book lovers book for people who love movies. Cinemaps has maps of over 30 films that you love, including Star Wars, Wizard of Oz, Princess Bride, Jaws and Breakfast Club. With each map, the book's creator includes paths that the major characters actually take. Want to see how the great-white shark chased that little boat, before getting blown to bits? How much territory did Billy cover on his big wheel in the Shining's Overlook Hotel?
It's all in this book and it beautifully illustrated. This is the coffee table book that people will look through, talk about, and use as a movie guide the next time they turn on their favorite flick. Because it's not just maps. It also includes wonderful little secrets about the movies and expands upon what we already know from watching the movie previously. This is a great book for In-Laws and Co-Workers, because it's a magical conversation piece.
Meddling Kids was also a great book. I loved it so much, that I naturally go into a detailed description and a list of all the things that make it great. This 30 second thing is murder and I decided that I'll give the review if they have to drag me off kicking and screaming.
Meddling Kids by Edgar Cantero for Sibblings, Besties, & Buddies
Meddling Kids is a fantastic Horror/Comedy. It's essentially what would happen if the Scooby Gang grew up and moved on, leading dysfunctional lives after years of busting criminals posing as monsters. The author has fun with all the Saturday Morning Cartoon cliches and shows us that as we've grown out of cartoons, so have those characters.
You're going to laugh with recognition of the tropes and the characters. You're going to be drawn into the incitement as these old friends get pulled into another mystery, one with real, and you're going to love these people you feel you've known for decades.
This book includes but isn't about they mystery and monsters. It's about taking that group from the old cartoons and giving them some closure with their final case. It's about finally finding the thing you've been after all your life. Trust me, you're laugh, you'll shiver, you'll pass this book on to your best friend.
Meant more of a joke than anything, I decided to throw some fun into the mix by offering up the Kama Sutra Colouring Book as a suggestion for sweethearts. As this blog is being written before the actual event, I'm still not sure how well it will go over, but I'm hoping for a laugh and hoping that it sells.
The Kama Sutra Colouring Book for Sweeties
There's nothing like staying in with your sweetie. Put a log on the fire, pour a glass of wine, put on that Barry White, and bust out the colored pencils. Couples are best together when they can laugh and love and pass knowing little glances. That kind of thing is part of why they're together in the first place. So curl up with your sweetie this holiday and together, discover something fun, funny, and colorful. This book is full of amazing erotic scenarios, that you and your partner can laugh over while coloring. After all, real love is exciting and sweet and funny. So this is the perfect stocking stuffer for your loved one. No shame, no judgment, just this book and a box of crayons.
For the teens, I decided to dip into a pool that's new to me. I've never read Phillip Pullman's His Dark Materials trilogy, but I thought I'd start by reading the prequel, The Book of Dust. This timed in at under 30 seconds but, honestly, I felt like I was floundering. Did I give enough information to make it sound good? We'll see.
The Book of Dust- La Belle Sauvage by Phillip Pullman for Teens
Book one of a new trilogy by Phillip Pullman. It takes place 10 years before The Golden Compass, and centers around a group of young people protecting an infant named Lyra, while in a canoe called La Belle Sauvage. Perfect for teens who are into fantasy and who read Pullman's books when they were younger. Also, this book deals with the freedom of speech. In it, the Magesterium or the Church, actively and violently suppresses heresy. Teens will love it and relate. Pullman is telling them that their voices matter, that what they say is important.
Last but certainly not least is a book for the little ones. The original book I chose was wonderfully illustrated, it was educational, and it made me laugh. However, that book isn't easy to get ahold of. My runner up was actually just as funny, and might be just as good for an expecting dad as it is for the tots themselves.
Mustache Baby for the Little Ones
Mustache Baby is a cool little board book about a baby born with a mustache. The doctor gives his parents the warning to look out for how the mustache grows. If it curls on the ends, he'll be headed for a life of crime, but if it stays full and respectable, the baby will grow to be a law abiding citizen. Of course, the baby adopts both styles. He catches kids with their hands in the cookie jar and becomes a cereal criminal. Little kids will love that this baby has a mustache. It'll get giggles right away. And dad's with mustaches will love reading this book to their kids. I know I'm tempted to, and my daughter is in high school.
Update***
Come back here December 10th, for an update on how the 30 Second Book Reviews went down. Until next time, catch you outside the cube!