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RE: THE SIMPLE WAYS OF GOD: DIVORCE - An Original Book From @narrowminded Released EXCLUSIVELY on STEEMIT
But, if we take vows into consideration, we can only remarry after death, if we only say "til death do we part."
If a Christian couple believes in remarriage after fornication or adultery, they had best include that in their oaths, otherwise they do not have that option, because they swore another oath that didn't include that.
The vows say "forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her/him, so long as ye both shall live". My ex did not "forsake all other women". In fact he insisted he was going to keep a mistress and I should be content in my position of the wife. He BROKE the marriage contract, not me. Therefore I did not need to still keep the part of the contract that said "till death."
I refused to stay even though he wanted me to. I filed for divorce, not him. Some think because I left that I caused the divorce; however, I never broke the contract.
I know that I gave him way more chances to repent and change than he deserved. I didnt want to, but God spoke to my heart to put aside my pain and offer him a chance to repair the marriage. He refused. I divorced him, lost all my money and my house and savings to him, and eventually remarried and started over and had children.
I have ZERO guilt. I studied and know scripture and God support this.
I can't imagine not having had the opportunity to have children and a family because of my ex's ridiculous sexual behaviour.
I thought about "forsaking all others" a bit more and what it means.
It's possible that we could both be right -- that one or two sexual betrayals might not result in "forsaking all others" IF the guilty party actually feels guilty and repents and is forgiven and given the chance to redeem themselves and tries to make the marriage work.
But when one party insists that they will continue on with an affair while they are married, and that they don't feel guilty -- then most clearly and definitely they have not "forsaken all others." They have absolutely broken the marriage contract and vows. And the offended spouse has the right (I might say duty) to leave that horrible situation.
Marriage is a contract.
An example of a contract is: You pay me $900/month and I rent you the house. If you quit paying $900/month, you get booted out of the house.
So the marriage contract could be intrepretated as "If you bring another person into this marriage to continue on an affair, thus "forsaking" me, then I will not need to continue on in this marriage.
I also made a verbal contract with my ex well before marriage, that if he ever cheated on me that I would leave.
Actually, rightly viewed, marriage is a covenant. A covenant binds the covenanter to their vows, irrespective of whether the other party honors theirs.
Remember how God made Abraham sleep during the Abrahamic covenant? It was one sided, though God did place certain conditions on some aspects of it.
I'm not in complete agreement with this article, but wanted to add this important distinction in light of your comment. To be clear, I do consider fornication and abandonment grounds for divorce and remarriage to be permissible after each.