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RE: To understand what church is, you must first understand what it is not .
For me, I believe that 1 Corinthians 14 is a major part of what believers gathering together should look like that is almost completely missed by many modern Christians. Interestingly enough, if the chapters are viewed in order, a peculiar picture emerges.
1 Corinthians 12 - "The Spiritual Gift Chapter"
1 Corinthians 13 - "The Love Chapter"
1 Corinthians 14 - "The Church Chapter"
Why? Because to use your spiritual gifts in church (the gathering together of believers) a lot of love will need to be exercised.
We must live life with one another in grace and love. And we do not have to flounder around in our gatherings. Blessed that we are given instructions and structure by which we can use our giftings!