情感美文:我养你,谢谢 你养不起 Emotional beauty: I raise you, thank you for not raising
我爱你,听着让人小鹿乱撞,那我养你可能就会让你的小鹿撞死。
一直以来女人要的安全感是一道永远解不开的命题,我想要的不是天边的星星也不是豪车名牌,而是你给我的安全感。年轻的时候最容易被男人的花言巧语所骗,我爱你就够让人心动了,当他说出我养你怕是那颗鸾心都快跳出体内了。
于是你开始安心做你的全职太太,打理家庭丈夫的贤内助,儿子的好妈妈。岳父岳母眼里的好儿媳,在外逛街消费好像日子真的过起来无忧无虑了。在家有丈夫养着,出门可以刷丈夫给的卡,什么都不担心。
时间久了逛街购物都烦了,指甲做来做去也只喜欢那几个颜色。购物不能带来快感了,丈夫好像回家的时间越来越晚你开始慌了,开始窥探他在公司的生活跟什么人接触,有没有什么女的有接触。说风就是雨开始变得敏感,易怒。这一切来源于他的我养你啊,我给你最好的生活啊。你害怕失去这样的生活金钱和花言巧语堆砌起来的安全感。
《恋爱先生》里顾遥要和宋宁宇离婚并且要求男方净身出户,到处调查他出轨的事实真相,为了能得到净身出户的财产不顾一切撕破脸皮,七年的感情变成在陌生人面前无休的争论,最后宋宁宇妥协我不想七年的婚姻到最后落到如此狼狈。
当初你大学毕业,没有工作来到美国我养你,给你最好的生活住最好的房子,穿最光鲜亮丽的衣服,风吹不着,雨淋不到。你为我做过什么到最后还问我要财产,对啊又是那句当初我说的我养你,现在我不养你你就需要金钱来给你安全感了。
曾以为,安全感应该是爱人每天的晚安,一起许下的誓言,彼此紧握的双手,可后来才知道,说晚安的人会离开,许下的誓言会更改,紧握的双手也会松开。
真正的安全感,从来都是自己给自己的,是来自于内心的独立和自足。
当自己充满安全感的时候,就不会每天惶恐对方要离开自己,不会在独自面 对世界的时候手足无措,不会把丈夫、婚姻当作生命的全部,更不会在婚姻 触礁的时候以为天就要塌了。
想从丈夫身上找安全感?别傻了。
别人给你的只能是依靠,自己给自己的,才是安全感。
《我的前半生》中的罗子君也是一直想着俊生说的“他养我啊”,但她的丈夫出 轨了出轨对象是一个30岁的离婚妇女还带着孩子,没有丝毫魅力可言子君的世 界就崩塌了,以前许诺养自己一辈子的丈夫,如今有了新欢头也不回的离开 了,这就是我养你的后果婚姻的残酷。
曾以为把自己的一生许诺给这个男人,相信这句毒鸡汤能给自己带来无忧无虑不需要劳累奔波的生活,但是我养你同时也意味着,一切以他为中心以他的喜好来做原则。
我养你的本质就是一场交易,我养你用钱换来你青春时期的陪伴与爱情,买你洗衣做饭,侍奉父母和默默付出。
我养你,你养不起我对你付出的不止是我的时间和精力,更是消耗的无尽的爱和青春年少。优秀的婚姻从来不是你站在这里不动我给你最好的生活和物质条件,而是两个人并肩往前走去开拓前面更好的风景。婚姻里保持自己的单身力,有他在可以,没他我一个人也行。
I love you, listen to the pounds and I raise you could have killed you.
For a long time, women's sense of safety is a proposition that can never be solved. What I want is not the stars on the horizon, nor the luxury car brand, but the sense of security you gave me. Young men are most likely to be blandishments cheat, I love you enough to let people have a heart, when he said I support you if it is the heart of the heart almost jump out in luan.
Then you start to do your full-time wife, husband's family to take care of your wife, good mother son. The good daughter-in-law in the eyes of his father-in-law's mother's mother in the eyes of her mother in the eyes of his mother-in-law in the eyes of her mother in the outside world seemed to be carefree. There is a husband at home, you can go out to brush your husband's card, nothing to worry about.
For a long time, shopping and shopping are annoying, and the nails do just like the colors. Shopping can't bring pleasure. The husband seems to be coming home late. You begin to panic and begin to spy on anyone who is in company's life. The wind is that the rain begins to become sensitive and irritable. All this comes from his I raise you, I give you the best life. You are afraid to lose the sense of security that is stacked with money and rhetoric.
"Love" in Mr. Gu Yao and Song Ningyu divorce and asked the man to cleanse the family, everywhere investigation he derailed the truth, in order to get wiped out the property fling caution to the winds decorum skin, the feelings of seven years into in front of strangers round the debate, Song Ningyu finally compromise I don't want to end up in seven years of marriage so embarrassed.
When you graduate from college, did not work to the United States I support you, give you the best life live in the best house, wearing the most glamorous clothes, no wind, no rain. What did you do for me? In the end, I asked for my property. Yes, that's what I said, I raised you. Now I don't want to raise you, you need money to give you a sense of security.
I once thought that a sense of security should be a good night's promise, a pledge made by each other and a clasped hands. Only later did we know that the good night people would leave, the promised oath would change, and the clasped hands would be released.
The true sense of security has always been to oneself, from the independence and self - sufficiency of the heart.
When they are full of sense of security, they will not be afraid of each other everyday. They will not feel left alone when they face the world alone. They will not take their husbands and marriages as their lives, nor will they think that the sky is going to collapse when their marriage is on the rocks.
Want to find a sense of security from your husband? Don't be silly.
What others give you is to rely on, and what you give yourself is a sense of security.
"My former life in Luo Zijun is always thinking that" he Junsheng kept me ah, but her husband derailed derailed object is a 30 year old divorced women with children, no charming world collapses son Jun, promised her a lifetime before raising her husband, now have a girlfriend, never return to the left, this is what I keep your marriage to the cruel consequences.
I thought I promised my life to this man. I believe that this poisonous chicken soup can bring free life to oneself, and it doesn't need to work hard. But I support you, and at the same time, it means that everything is centered on him and his hobby is the principle.
The essence of my raising you is a deal, I raise you for your companionship and love in your youth, to buy your laundry, to serve the parents and to give it silently.
I keep you, and you can't afford to pay more than my time and energy to you, but also the endless love and youth. Excellent marriage is never the best life and material condition you can stand here. Instead, two people go forward together and explore the better scenery ahead. It is possible to keep one's own single power in a marriage. I can do it without him.