Comedy open mic round 12.... The irony of life.

I grew up in the rough part of town. The part of town you enjoyed as a kid but grew up to notice how fucked it was.

My role model was a "gangster"(if the "word"means someone that sells Indian hemp and sleeps with all the house helps in the street).

Don't get me wrong I didn't admire the shit he did. I just admired the respect and the Charisma he had, well, that was until he got shot in the early hours of one Friday morning.
O' G was dead and I was left role model-less,
another black kid trying to understand the irony of life.

I grew up with the utmost respect for money, because dad always found a way to relate it to everything.

Like if you were playing outside on a school day he would say you were "wasting the school fees he paid for".

If you forgot to put off the TV after watching it then you were wasting the electricity he paid for.

Let's not talk about not finishing the food you took from the pot, cos that one earned you a sermon. A sermon of how there were millions of children in Africa who had nothing to eat.

So I guess you can understand why I sleep with my ATM card under my pillow.
Because I have learnt to guard the little I have jealously.

It's been a good week, basic but still fair enough to be called good.
Every day spent teaches it's own unique lesson if only you are paying enough attention.

I am finally understanding that you need money to make money.

This is one of the most critically obvious but ignored facts of life.

A poor person today has a high risk of being poor for the next year or two, or maybe even more. If not tell me why someone that wrote a book titled " How to make money", is looking for the money to publish it.
😂😂

I respect motivational speakers, not the type that come with all those no-meaning rhyming words like " Focus your purpose to energize your locus, so that when you move with onus, life will pay you with bonus; no, I mean the ones that actually impact knowledge with their words.

You can't argue with the fact that everybody needs a little motivation once in a while.
Like the kind you get when a girl tells you that she would be coming to your room in the next 20 mins and you see yourself cleaning a room that normally takes you an hour in 5 mins.

Our parents found out the power of little motivation and that is why they kept promising us that bicycle if we came first position in class, even though they knew they would not buy it.

Today I want to motivate you all. Yes, I would be giving out a little of my little money to 10 lucky people that upvote and resteem this post.
If you reputation is above 45 you don't need that money, because it can barely buy you a good plate of Yoruba jollof rice cooked with half cup of pepper. I am serious.

I believe that together we can find all these whales we have been looking for and if we don't find them then we can fart up this steemit ocean until it becomes so dirty that @ned would have to push the restart button so that everybody can start life afresh as a little sardine. 😱😁😁😜😄😉

Shoutout to the @comedyopenmic crew. Ain't no crew like you guys.
Comedyopenmic is global now.

Hope you enjoyed yourself, now it's time to hit that upvote button - the way you love to hit a stripper's big ass while she is giving you a lap dance, so we can all help a bit in supporting the price for the winners.

😉 Dirty humor never hurt no one

SEE YA

I nominate @cheesom and @pandygirl to join the comedy open mic contest.