Choosing the Right Pussy (Comedy Open Mic Round #18)
When choosing the perfect pussy, there's so much to consider, so here's a bit about three different types, just to help with the decision making process.
I'm sure you've imagined the exotic type of pussy, the Egyptian Sphynx, conjuring up images of Cleopatra herself or other harem-like fantasy beauties.
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But sometimes, the image you've dreamed about differs greatly from the real deal.
Interestingly enough, there's nothing exotic about this pussy, in fact, the Egyptian Sphynx's originsare none other than Toronto, Canada. We Canadians enjoy all kinds of weird pussy, too polite to say otherwise. Or maybe you thought it was an Asian Hairless, a misnomer and an oxymoron, if what I've heard is at all true. The truth is, "although they look completely hairless, they are actually covered in a fine layer of what feels like peach fuzz", for those who like to pet all things soft.
Then there's the long haired pussy, a bit out of vogue, but still loved by the older folks for it's soft mounds of fur. In fact, there's a breed called the American Curl that touts silky soft fur. A beautiful pussy indeed!
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"The ears curl out and backwards making the cat look alert with a happy expression." And who doesn't want their pussy to be happy? No one. That's who. This pussy is a dream as it's "very people-orientated and wants to be in your company constantly." Now that's some pussy!
Then there's the Persian pussy, in a league all its' own! This pussy has more hair than I'd know what to do with!
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"In the perfect example of the breed the coat would flow over the body to reach the floor". A bit much if you ask me, but to each his own. With that much hair, it generally "mats easily" and needs "daily grooming", so this pussy is a high maintenance one for sure! Just know what you're getting into before you decide on this one!
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I'd be remiss if I didn't talk about my own pussy here, who I've affectionately named Buddy! Home-grown, domestic, short hair, with a pleasing personality and full of love. Buddy is the best and most relaxed pussy ever :) And Brian of course, loves this pussy too!!
I believe in free choice, so enjoy whatever type of pussy you love, just remember to treat it right and it'll return the favor two-fold!
I was tagged by @profanereviews weeks ago to join in the comedy fun over at openmic , then @beeyou wrote a post about watermelon nipples, @davemccoy about tight asses, @abh12345 about hot balls, and @profanereviews about dicks. I'm tagging @doomsdaychassis as well because he's been a big part of this too :) So this is my "pussy" contribution.
There! Happy now guys? I joined in on the dabauchery :)
Proud Member of :
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This is why we created @comedyopenmic! so nobody should go through life without a good guide to choosing a suitable and appropriate pussy!
oh yeah in my abode we're nuts about our hot-dog also named "buddy" ;p
Thanks @dj123! I appreciate the applause and am so pleased to have filled a niche here :)
And a hot-dog named Buddy!!! Our buddy has the same sausage physique :)
so glad you finally found your amazing niche!
come by our animal house full of cock and pussy too... hopefully the crazy channels will inspire you!
COM
Mad HouseDiscord Server: https://discord.gg/uy8KTdsoh yeah congrats in your win ;)
https://steemit.com/comedyopenmic/@comedyopenmic/comedy-open-mic-round-18-winners-post
thanks for the invite! I actually just joined today...the names of the channels are oddly titillating haha
Thanks for the congrats too :) It was much appreciated...I was very surprised by the overall reaction to tell you the truth!
I love my homegrown pussy the best. always loving and so cute
haha You better! :)
Was all excited about the topic...then it was about cats...yawn....lol
haha gotcha!
Now that is some pussy luvin! I knew you had it in you. The Asian Hairless ROFL, and I usually just stick with LOL. It so reminded me of @doomsdaychassis's stripper story, which of course, had to be an Asian chick as well! I swear, I don't know what kinda crew I am rolling with these days!!
Back on topic, we now have all sexy body parts covered 😂! Way to go Lynn, and glad you jumped on the bandwagon with this one. I love all those pussy cats!
Don't forget to edit your post to nominate two people to join the fun!
come to think of it, that asian was hairless to.
So glad you enjoyed it! Hey, you pushed me into it too, so there was no way I was leaving out the Asian HairlessROFL :)
I have two siamese pussies of my own. They are both super soft, but can be pretty needy at times. When I am working on my computer, one of the pussies jumps on the table and rubs all over my face until I pet her until she lays down and falls asleep next to me. The other pussy just likes to get my attention at random times throughout the day for a quick rubbin but then leaves me alone for the rest of the day. They are both super soft, but pretty hairy.
This is me trying to handle both pussies at once.
I hear it's a common fantasy to handle 2 pussies at once but you have shown what the reality is lol
hahaha @derangedvisions, that's what you get for saddling up to two of them 😎 Love it! Thanks for an awesome comment!
Omg that was too funny! I myself love the Asian pussy in fact i just rescued two.
This is sake.
And this is sushi.
omg on a serious note for a moment, those are so cute!
Congratulations of rescuing some sweet pussy :) (Sorry, couldn't help myself there haha)
ROFL
I have to pass on commenting on this one because the dog house in the yard doesn't have wifi hooked up . well done !
Must be in a bad position, have you tried fiddling with the box?
After reading the post I went straight to the box and bang it hard in multiple position.
here we go LOL
hahaha @wolfhart, I see you've forgotten about the doghouse :)
yea Asher pulled me in. I saw it comming and didn't avoid it
😂😂 that's the spirit!
Sometimes giving it a good hammering works wonders!
( had to remove 'fist' from the line above - even I've got limits! )
No matter how hard you hit it keeps purring and squirting , damn thing has 9 long lives
Hahaha now you've done it!
🔫🚿🚰💦🐳
bahahaha @abh12345 that's always the first to try to get it fired up
Thanks for the tip! 😂
hahahaha I just saw this!! You crack me up!! :) We could just go on and on with this one I think!
Plenty of room to fit more in here!
hahaha there usually is!!
Probably a wise decision @wolfhart; it could all really go off the rails in no time! :)
to late it's all over . Pussy is out of the bag
Get that thing on a leash!
lol
hahaha... awesome! You have completed our series spectacularly! I'm thrilled to have pussy lovers added to the delicious nipples, hot balls, tight asses and big dicks series! lol... I won't bring up the hairless jokes, that was funny for sure :P
Glad you enjoyed it Dave!! Have you read through the comments here? They're better than the post lol
@lynncoyle1 lol... I have just read through some of them and yes it is hilarious... You did a wonderful job with your dirty mind young lady! :)
And I know I told you earlier, but you deserve the nice curie on this one, it was very creative and fun as hell! (see I can cuss ;) )
Thanks Dave, I guess my dirty mind is out in the open now! I gotta say, I was really surprised with the curie! And I know you can cuss buddy haha
lol... yes I can even say "shit" and "ass" publicly ;)
You and your dirty mind deserved it, I think it is awesome that you capped off the series with a great post that included some very awesome lead up posts to it! :)
I hope you are having a nice Friday night :)
haha I feel like we're being bad, talking in church kinda thing!!
Thanks for the kudos though! Seriously, I put it off for so long because writing a 'funny' post is really a whole different ball game, isn't it? I hit "post" and thought, "please let someone like it" haha
Friday night is pretty chill here, just hanging out, but that's a good thing. Hoping the same for you! Are you finding it pretty quiet around here? This whole week even?
@lynncoyle1 cool that you had a good chill night and I am finding the same too... I hope that means I get back into the top 30, I don't like being called a slacker by the Queen :P ...
And yes I feel that way about my posts too, but yours was awesome... Also got a reader's choice award or something like that from our friends over at @comedyopenmic! Btw if you haven't voted for them for witness you should, and not because they give you a platform to air out that dirty mind either! They are legit community guys and think they are majorly helpful!
You'll never truly be a slacker to me Dave!
I should check with Asher, seeing as he's my proxy. If you're supporting them, that's good enough for me 😅
oh my hahahhahahha this completes almost all the parts needed here and I have always considered myself as a doggo person but I wouldn't have thought I have a liking to pussy hahahahha
hahaha just don't tell your dog that :)
Thanks for taking time — and doing such an excellent job — to clarify the many possibilities of pussy! Myself, I am more of a common "Street Pussy" who got lucky and found a posh place to call home.
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hahaha @curatorcat, I'm so glad you approve!! :)