How to keep the fire burning...

in #community8 years ago (edited)

I'm looking at my history and I'm pretty amazed that for the first time in my life: I am writing a lot and constantly.
But, I must confess, there was a period of a few months when my faith was very low and my motivation almost in existent...
How did I get over it?

I want to start by saying that motivation is a fickle mistress. If you want to do anything, anything at all to some degree of proficiency, "being motivated" is a very shitty strategy! Motivation is a great way to get started, it might give you the push, the kick in your arse to MOVE IT!. But it fades...oh, boy, it fades SO fast.
Now, discipline, is something else entirely. Discipline is will-power on a schedule. You make a promise to yourself to do something, and you do it, no matter how you feel or how tired you are or "maybe not today". What?!
Listen, one of the best advice I ever got, one that I try to remember DAILY is this:

A lot of people are losers who have no motivation to NOT be losers. Why would you want to be like them? Understanding what happens when you become unmotivated should be enough for you to want to separate yourself from the losers.
Each choice you make is a move closer to, or further away from, your ambitions. For every choice you make, consider what happens if you make a motivated choice versus what happens if you make an unmotivated choice. Motivated choices keep you on track. Unmotivated choices are self-sabotaging, and as a consequence, you'll never get the result you're hoping for.
Drew Murphy – Personal Trainer and Gym Owner

You see that he talks about motivation but I read it as discipline. "Motivated choices" are not ran by "motivation" but by the discipline to stick to the goals. That's how you get yourself where you want to get.
At the end of the day, it's all on you. All in your goals. All in your will-power....

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...that being said, I will tell you what got me throught my swamp.
After Steemfest, I had a pretty bad time in my life. Life happens as they say, and Steemit and writing seemed to be an after-thought given my very real, very intense events in my life. That was a big one. I also had lost a bit of faith in the crypto world, for various reason. I was basically only connected to Steemit and that rarely. I was on the verge of giving up.

What saved me?

For one, I love to write. I think that maybe, I need to write! So from time to time, I needed to put something on "paper" and what other places to do that but Steemit?
And whenever I came and posted, I'd see some of the old friends from the beginning. People I met, followed, grew on steemit with from the beggining of my journey here.
@meesterboom would always have a nice comment and encouraging words.
@knozaki2015 would always be graceful and nice.
In the chat, the people I half-lost touch with would be welcoming and friendly. I did not feel for a second that I deserve it.
Sure, I met a lot of these people at SF and I really liked them, but what could I have done there to deserve this kind of show of friendship? I did not think I deserve it...but there it was.

So, for a while, I was rarely on Steemit, rarely on the chat, rarely present and yet, every time I put my head up for a while, it was...good. It felt good.
I'd go and read what people posted and seen a lot of people I used to follow back when they joined [ most of them after me! ] keep posting good stuff, keep being active, their reputation going up, the quality of their post honestly A LOT better. They were here to stay.
I, again, felt ashamed...for giving up on my writing, on Steemit...but more importantly: on Them. And ultimately: on myself.

I got back in. I started to write again. I started to find a flow, to find time, to find FIRE.
I look back on my history now and I don't know how I managed to write so much...but the clue is in there, in the community, in those people.
I am here because of them. For me, Steemit is those people I have cool chats with, read their great posts, got to know and respect.

I want to end this by saying that if you read this and you think: "Well, that's easy! I had no one!" then read this:
Yes, it was easier but in the end no one can give you the motivation, discilpine, PASSION for what you want to do. You can't wait around for someone to tell you that you should o that, that you could, that you are good. No.
There's simply no one else's responsibility and shouldn't be that you fail or succeed.
I know, I know too well that I could never do anything if I were not pushed, encouraged and cajoled by friends, family and random people who thought they could help me a bit. That's all true.BUT, no one else wrote for me, no one else sat for hours in a chair and tried to do it better so people actually enjoy reading it. I had to do it myself.

Now, there are people out there who would do so much for a person. As the saying goes:


Some will do this, some will have a natural inclination to do this, if there's something in you that is willing to give up on much of yourself for someone else, I pity you but..I also think that's amazing, rare, incredible, lovely, worthy of everything gift.
But I want you to remember that in the end, it's about them. You can only do this much.

I hope all this makes sense to some degree.
Thank you!
and
Thank you for reading.

PS: people not mentioned here, you know who you are!

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Motivation always comes from rewards whether those stem from one's financial, social or intellectual capital. You are at a certain wavelength in your life right now that you have all three going on.

We can't be motivated all the time because life entails change — and this is exactly what keeps us going. If everything was the same all the time, then nothing will ever exist.

I do agree but I also want to say that this is not all the time true.
Stephen King used to say that he's daily at his desk writing from 10 a.m to 3 p.m.
EVERY DAY.
He says he doesn't believe in inspiration but hard work but if inspiration WANTS to find him, it should be easy :) I like this logic.
For me, writing is about making a commitment to myself to write daily. I can't just phone it in...
It's less about motivation but habit and discipline and that's the whole point. You will have allies and good circumstances...for a while! But in the end, the habit will win out..if you don't have the habit when motvation flies away, you'll stop writing. Or, I WILL.

So, I guess, I think a certain habit is a way to keep going when faced with change. Or else, you'll never achieve anything!

I do agree but I think for him writing was more like breathing. If you have to tell yourself to "commit", you are losing the whole point and still have way ahead to go.

same applies to exercise. if you find yourself being pushed to go to the gym then sooner or later you will be fucked. same applies to everything really.

remember back in the day how many people where getting massive rewards in here and were writing motivational posts about how it changed their life, inspiring others yada yada yada?

price tanked and all got the fuck out. :)

price was a great motivator.
but that's one of the reason I always appreciated you and are included in this list i hope you realize.
and the fact that robinhood design is still amazing to me! Loved it then, love it now.

:)

Well, when you love reading, writing (and in my case debating) price becomes irrelevant!

glad to have you around too man.

(Although at some point we have to debunk the Warren Buffet meme)

Good post, especially the part of changing the fire and motivation in to discipline. It is the same with sporting, and the same with my own business.

i feel so too. It can and should be applied to everything that is worth doing

Thank you for writing this article. It's written so well and honestly. I'm so new at steeming and need articles like this to keep me on target. You helped me to understand how to keep going when the motivation fades. Very good luck in your writing career.

this means a lot. thanks!

This was very nice to read :) "Don't set yourself on fire to keep other's warm." was something that I really needed to hear.

So out of this experience, what was the most important aspect that you've learned?

be friends with good people :)
glad you enjoy it, I think that's smth a lot of people need to hear but not necessarily follow as i said....

Yea, I had to write it down on a sticky note.
Have you thought about making a post about friendship?

I'm a big believe in being honest...sometimes, I'm afraid of some stuff I might say could be less nice. Friendship is great, but loss of friendship...and disappointments in friendships are hard to take. I take it hard anyway. I dunno if I want to exploe that too much as I try to not be very attached to how i was disspaointed but try to understand why they might have done it. Also, open dialogue...
But, something I'll write down for a future post maybe!
Thanks a lot for reading and suggestions. Always appreciated!

What's your take on friendship?

Wow this post is great. It resonates so much with how I felt or still feel about this platform.

We simply have an incredible community.

Nothing but love for you my man! :)

means a lot! It's hard to write stuff like that...glad they do resonate with people and with you!
AS I told you already, your name is the best!!

haha yeah you did!! :D Thank you! I remember that back in the day on the Steemit Slack channel. Damn. That's almost a year ago.

Hope I can make it to Steemfest 2 so we can reconnect :)

It can be tough that's for sure but you got over the hump and that's all that matters, next time you will remember this time and the time after that time you will remember the time before this time and somehow it will all be good.

:0D

:0)

I loved your message! As someone who has dealt with depression and an anxiety disorder, I completely understand how it feels to be weighed down by "de-motivation". Although in my journey I've found that happiness is a choice that you have to make everyday, and you have to work for it. What are some of the things you do in your day to day life to be happily motivated?

I think remembering day in day out that "happiness is a choice that you have to make everyday" is the best way to deal with this.
I recommend you listen to this if you haven't!

I adore David Foster Wallace!! Have you seen the film based on his life "The End of the Tour" starring Jason Segal and Jesse Eisenberg? If not, I recommend you check it out!

You've definitely got a follow from me buddy :)

words of inspiration and motivation for all steemians to keep on steeming. good sharing thanks @ravanelulmarin ... up, re & fo cheers buddy @bitrocker2020

I agree completely @razvanelulmarin - discipline, more so than motivation, is the REAL fire that keeps us climbing to the top and achieve every goal we set out to accomplish. Motivation flickers and ebbs, but discipline never burns out!

Build a man a fire, you keep him warm for a day,
but set a man on fire, you keep him warm for the rest of his life.