PROOF: Women Love Assholes

Dating in 2017 is an absolute disaster, I highly recommend not doing it. If you are considering dating I actually recommend you read this horrible Bumble exchange and then consider what I am considering... moving out into the middle of the woods, disconnecting my internet, and dying alone.... but in peace.

Here's my a quick personal backstory... When I was in my teens and most of my 20's I was the typical asshole guy. I hooked up with lots of beautiful girls and never had a shortage of opportunities. However, it was unfulfilling and ultimately lead to emptiness. For the past few years I have lived completely differently. I don't want to just hook up. I want to get to know someone without introducing the sexual side right at the beginning. You could say... dating: the old fashion way. I am here to tell you that it doesn't work in 2017.

Ok, so you just read the opening. Not a completely asshole message but it's certainly walking the line. And suprise, su-fucking-prise she responded within minutes! Previous message response times were 24 hours +. So let's carry on with this cluster fuck of human interaction...

First of all, being a 21 year old model in South Beach is "painful". There are so many things I could launch into as to why that comment is almost definitely ridiculous, all of which involve obscenities and would take me into an asshole level that I might never be able to return form, so I'll just leave it there.... painful. You know what is painful though Danielle... trying to have a normal conversation with you, that's fucking painful.

The fact that she responded so quickly and so intrigued honestly just made my anger grow. She proved my point.... women love assholes.

So I did exactly what George Castanza would do on opposite day... I fought my intuition of being a gentlemen and pressed further into the land of assholeness.

You would think this would be the last message before she would unmatch me, block me, or call the police. But nope!

Now for people who don't want to live alone in a forest, this would have been the opportunity to return to sanity and ask her out. No doubt in my mind I could have gone out with her. But that is not what I did. No, its not. Instead, I sent her a message that was so dark, so real, so horrible, so degrading, that she unmatched me and probably decided to get back with her ex boyfriend, who is most likely a club promoter in south beach, with a coke problem, who lives in his parents basement, has 5,000+ friends on instagram, but has friends with yachts. I'm sure they are very happy together right now. He's probably ignoring her texts as I type this and she's about to orgasm from it.

Fuck dating in 2017.

Let me know if you want more of these stories cause this is the tip of the ice berg. You will have to notify me via US Mail though because I'm moving to the forest right now and disconnecting all internet. Also, if anyone wants my crypto private keys just let me know, I won't need them off the grid. At least someone can enjoy it. Fuck this.