As a Family Each Year We Take Our Youngest Offspring To Sit On a Stranger's Lap

Some people might think it would be a bad idea. It is not a big deal. The man always has a job, at least in retail. The supply chain experience on his resume might be exaggerated.

We know for sure that there are thousands of pictures of him with kids on his lap. The details get fuzzy after that.

He is in red pajamas all day. He is over indugent. He loves cookies late at night. Also milk. We know that.

Kids love him but they are easily tricked. I had four of them lay down behind my bike ramp before I jumped over all four of them. I was only 3 years older then them then. He is way older than those kids.

If his international resume of lies or lack of concern for the bmi index doesn't get you, the way he gets your kids to lie will.

A soon as he gets a few pictures, then the questions start.

Have you been good this year (or testing out what you can get away with like all the other kids in the rest of the world)!

Then he asks the kids what they want. They tell him. He lies. He lies some more. The parents find out.

They love December because they can threaten to cancel Christmas all the time and hide things their family members should have like gloves, hats, and cookies.

Why not stay home from work, and build miniture things your home has already has so that your kids can feel in control of something, like another tiny kitchen with even less food.

Or have them use a lightbulb to get a sugar high by using a tiny little oven.

If egg nog was good, they would sell it all year.

December is a month to dread and fear.