Refuse Lost

Have you ever felt that feeling of complete failure?

Looking for inspiration, you find the exhilarating feeling of amazement. That rush of awe coupled with a humble sense of humanity’s greatness.

Flood.

The well starts to fill up and your at the bottom.
Rocks in your pockets.

You let the sadness slowly creep its way up until it has consumed your every fibre. You fully submit to the feeling of loss as you drown in your thirst for life.

Time seems to slip away, up and out into light blurred by a depth of wanting.

A maddening want to stop wanting.

Wonder hits.
When will your bucket fall?

As helpful as helpless can be.
Needing more.

….

I’ve heard this song before.
No words. Just sweet release.

Flood.

….

At what point do you realize that you’ll die if you don’t let go of everything and start swimming?

At what point do you realize that it doesn’t even matter?

At what point is it enough?

….

I often wonder what he was wearing when he jumped from the bridge.

How my heart fell when I heard the news.

….

There’s no hiding from an image in the mind.
A memory stained upon all the other memories.
Hanging lifeless, overcome with the possibilities.

….

Gasping desperation.
Grasping hesitation.
Gravity in reverse.

….