Thanks for sharing your story about standing up to these negative people without sounding neither defensive nor offended. I used to be active on Facebook and often ran into content about bullied people who told us to either ignore the trolls, tell them « it’s not okay to be mean before it hurts people’s feelings », « what would your mother think if she saw you like this » or any other response that clearly shows the trolls succeeded in getting under their skin. Here I am as a father asking myself: « That doesn’t sound right. There has to be a better way to prepare my kids for the real world » and I absolutely loved your response.

Sarcasm and humor show that:
-you’re not offended
-you couldn’t care less what they think about you
-you actually laugh about it
-you’re not fighting back but actually going along with them
-you don’t take any of this seriously

Here’s a few you can use:
A: Shut up woman and go make me a sandwich!
B: Okay but I hope you have some Pepto-Bismol or Immodium handy... just in case. Just looking out for your best interests.

A: Come on girl! Quit boring us and show us your knockers!
B: Gee I don’t know... I could but then again, wouldn’t you rather enjoy your pastime and remain anonymous? I can point you to a few adult sites if you want. I won’t judge.

A: You suck! Go kill yourself.
B: But if I do, who will keep you occupied and make you feel great about yourself? I couldn’t possibly deprive you of that.

There are many ways of dealing with negative people and they all work as long as they don’t make you feel less about yourself. In my case, I think I’ll teach sarcasm and humor to my kids.

Thanks @coruscate.