What The Heart Feels...
This is not a rant. Neither does this post aims to judge anyone or make me come off as the nicest person. No. This isn’t my intention. I just want to request to people to be considerate towards one another and before pointing out that you work a lot and the other does not, just think over it for 2 seconds. I am a mother of an almost 5 year old son. He turns 5 this October 31st yayieee! And I work as well apart from the 200 crore jobs I have to do at my house, I do work as a content writer and since I have taken up a job about 5 months ago which is remote, but is a job nonetheless, I have to work 8 hours a day.
So with that, I am managing my household expenses solely and going through a really bad phase emotionally. With my marriage almost coming to an end, I am going through quite a lot. That said, I have this personal commitment to my son and every activity that he is involved in. I play with him, actually play for about 3 hours daily and I am engaging with him otherwise as well when he is at home. So far, I have never missed a PTM(parent teacher meeting), or any event in his school when parents are invited and I often have to stay back at his school for about half an hour because the little boss loves school after home time and wants to play.
Quite often, I come across mothers of kids from his class who tell me how difficult their lives are and how they cannot manage to pick their kids from school, and how easy it is for me because I have one kid which is why I can enjoy him too. My reply is mostly a smile or that I work as well besides doing the household chores so there is a lot to do, but yes I feel your pain. While they don’t know the pain I am going through or how I manage to struggle through my tasks and juggle my professional and personal lives and neither do I want them to know, I just want to say this:
It hurts when you point out the other person has it all easy while you are bearing the real pain of toil.
It hurts when you say how easy it is for me when you don’t know how many nights I haven’t slept in a row.
It hurts when you keep telling me how being a working woman is an easier option because then I don’t have to take care of the house.
Nothing is easy or difficult. Things are how things are. What is easy for me may be tough for you and what may be tough for you may be a piece of cake for me. This is how life is. And I completely get how hard it is to live in laws or take care of 4 kids, but that doesn’t mean my struggles aren’t real. We all have our own challenges in this world and while we feel our pain, we need to respect the struggle of others too. So yeah go ahead and tell me how difficult it is for you, but don’t insinuate I have a dozen chauffeurs running around me. Also, I believe it is all about priorities. I set my priorities straight when my son was 2. I wasn’t a very responsible mother before that. Was cranky and found it easier to put him in front of the laptop instead of spending quality time with him. But when I realized how Allah had blessed me by giving me a beautiful, healthy baby and how this was his amanat that I had to take care of, I prioritized him and him alone. So yeah, I am happy to miss out on a few hours of sleep or meet-up with a friend or can even keep the laundry piling up when I know my son needs me in any way, be it him asking me to play with him or me seeing him play happily in the school or in any other possible way.
Here I'd like to add that in no way am I implying that your priority isn't your child. Ofcourse, you love your kids and are a great parent, but are a different parent than I am and than all the others. All of us are different and that's the beauty of it because that's how we get to learn from one another. I learn from you how you manage 4 kids and in laws and if there's nothing to learn from me, fair enough but just be nice please. That's it. If this feels harsh to anyone, I apologize sincerely because that is never the intention. Love you all.
Love and light,
Sharoon.
Also, I'd like to tell you that I am working as the Content Developer and Social Media Facilitator for the Oxford Creative Hub. Oxford Creative Hub is an enterprise that focuses on big ideas and helping them grow and flourish so you can make more wealth. It is a one-stop shop when it comes to getting services and facilities for your business to establish, set, run, manage and prosper it.
The primary goal of the OCH is to help entrepreneurs, start-ups, businesses, bootstraps, innovators and emerging companies monetize their ideas and attain the wealth and abundance they aspire to achieve. It does that by enabling you to launch new businesses, enter new markets, commercialize and conceptualize breakthrough ideas for future opportunities and maximize your growth, productivity and success.
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OCH aims to help you and your business reach soaring heights of success by offering the following services:
• Startup Support
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Here are some of my articles that may interest you:
Are women who dress provocatively responsible for unwanted attention?
How to Support People without Making it Obvious
When Things Become Difficult to Cope with...
Is Life Actually Tough or Do We Make it Hard for Ourselves?
Functioning on a Wounded Heart and Soul...
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My daughter turns 6 the same day! Awesome!
Yayy! That's awesome. I call my son the Halloween baby haha
you are so right, we have no right to judge others or to make little of some one else's situation, some people get so caught up in their own world that they forget that other people hurt too, there is such a lack of empathy. You are doing an amazing job in what is a very difficult situation, and I can completely understand how you would feel overwhelmed and undervalued. Mothers who put their children first, do not always have an easy time of it. because deep down it makes those who don't, feel guilty even if they are not aware of it, it leaves them with an uncomfortable feeling that they do not like.
I have missed you on here beautiful and I hope that your days begin to get easier, please reach out to us on here who care deeply for you xxx much love and respect xxx