#1 Strategy In Business Negotiation

Disclosure: This content is written by @chewyiwennona, inspired by @aaronmcheong's podcast on DailyMastermind 95: Why Is Kindness The Best Negotiating Strategy? This subject is elaborated to illustrate the best strategy when it comes to negotiating business deals based on my personal experiences.

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Magic happens when a heart is kind. There is a distinct and recognizable aura that follows kindness. A dash of warmth, a sprinkle of understanding, a drop of trust into a whirlpool that brings it to still. Sets calmness and peace into motion like a universe in agreement. In that time and space, a memory forms, a memory that never fades, for an unseen trade have been done. A trade that forever binds one person to another. A trade that grows in the scales of positivity – like an overflowing river.

Kindness As A Priceless Trade

Business is about supporting your ecosystem, your industry – as long as your industry grows, you will grow. As long as your suppliers grow, you will grow. As long as your buyers grow, you will grow.

Help one another and show kindness because at one point of a time when you were starting out or down and out, someone or perhaps something gave you your breakthrough, believed in your ideas, believed in your passion, believe in you per se.

In a mind-boggling deal, he gave you an upper hand, he showed you kindness and in turn, you are his number one fan! His company is among the flyers and yet he came and had that cup of Teh Tarik in the mamak with you, when he could be in the Michelin star restaurant. He spoke with a twinkle in his eye and agreed on your terms. He signed the contract that gave you more benefits. In turn, you spoke only good words about him, you watch as he made business deals, you called him when there was a certain crook getting near him and of course invited him to every celebration of your company.

The Magic Of Kindness

He could have walked away. He never needed you. He never needed your deal. Should you have any ill intention or take advantage of his kindness or generosity, he could afford to just walk away, because he didn’t need you in the first place.

You gain the benefits but he became the decision maker in the deal. He gained your respect, he gained your trust, he gained your allegiance, he gained your following, he gained your listening ears, he gained a lifetime partner to journey with in the business industry.

Now in all your negotiations, you feel it. You have tasted the magic that is kindness that you know you don’t have to compete against, you don’t have to negotiate against, you don’t have to be against anyone when negotiating.

He has taught you a valuable lesson - that kindness and generosity goes leaps and bounds. You have learnt that in the long run he reaps his rewards, in the long run his business grew multiple times, in the long run he contributed so much to society and became a respectable entrepreneur in the industry.

You begin to lose your flawed thinking of wanting more: more money, more profits, more gain, more benefits, more advantage, more for me.

You then lose the loser mindset of negotiating:

How can I make the the scales tip my way? Nope I don’t want to be the loser here. It has to be win – win. How dare this deal come against me? How dare this person negotiate against me? This is a disadvantage for me!

You then lose the flawed logic of receiving more than what you give.

I want to get more out of this deal than you can and when I get more out of this deal that means I win. That is the outcome of our negotiation – I want to get more out of you! I want to win – I want get more than give more!

You begin to think out of the box of business that you have learnt or experience for so long. You become a real entrepreneur. You begin to see business as a lifelong journey of giving generously and reaping tremendously. Perhaps not instantaneously nor immediate gains from the deals, but you begin to see the long run rather than the short sprint.

You are happy to make this deal!

The deal of negotiated out of kindness.

It becomes obvious to you that this is the most profitable deal in the long run and you will make kindness your weapon in negotiation every single time you get the chance to. You will give away the short term advantage and make sure to give more than asked of you – because you know you will reap way more rewards than you can right now if you ask more of the deal. You better your position, become the bigger person and the key decision maker.

I am a huge fan of Gary Vaynerchuk and he always preaches , “ Kindness, kindness, kindness.”

Being an entrepreneur myself, I’ve reaped benefits from every deal when I chose to negotiate with kindness and generosity. By giving more, sometime in the future I’m getting way higher returns than what I invested initially. That’s the concept of it. I believe in it! I practice it! Every time I practice it, the results simply reaffirm my belief.

I am always willing to give up the short term in order to win in the long term. That’s my philosophy. I reflect that in the way I make my deals, in the way I negotiate. Every single time I negotiate with more kindness and generosity, I find myself in a better position by being the bigger person; becoming the key decision maker. For that, I am able to give more and then gain way more. I am not insecure in losing short term profits because I’m confident – that I’m going to make a long term gain that is going to make this deal extremely profitable in the long run.

If you’re not investing in the long term and you don’t know how to. The answer is kindness – be more kind, try to out kind your competitor, out kind the person negotiating against, try to out generous the other party – do more of the right thing basically be more kind – be more generous, forgiving, welcoming and positive. Do more of the right thing than the other person – show more kindness and generosity. Kindness is the way to go. The right way and the only way.

To be successful in life, be kind.

To be successful in business, be kind.

Whether in life or business you MUST be kind.

Fill your everyday with the magic of a kind heart. Your river of life will overflow with abundance.

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Follow me at @aaronmcheong for more insights and reflection about building the best business possible!

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1. Abundance and Collaboration: A 21st Century Business World