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RE: The Lady Doth Protest Too Much

in #feminism8 years ago

I have been ruminating on this topic since @sean-king originally posted on it. I’ve had a hard time trying to figure out what I really think and why. I don’t want to do a point-by-point breakdown of anyone’s arguments, but I do have some points I’d like to raise in regard to women using their sexuality as power. Is your sexuality what you want other people to focus on when they think of you? I, personally, want other people to think I’m pretty or desirable, but I’d rather not emphasize that part of me to the point where my other qualities take a back seat. I would rather people be able to see that I’m smart or talented or kind. When we draw people’s attention to a certain part of us (whether it’s sexuality, wealth, etc), then that’s what they will focus on. The question is….are we getting people to focus on what we really want them to? I have a friend who is a successful businessman. He bought a nice BMW, but then said he regretted buying it because of the type of women that it was attracting to him—women very interested in money. Is it possible to gain someone’s attention/service/etc with your sexuality and then be able to switch focus later? Possible, but perhaps difficult? Even if using your sexual power may get you what you want in the short-term, does it get you what you want in the long-term?

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A male would want them to focus on whatever gives him an advantage. :-).

Some are mischaracterizing my position. I never said that women ONLY have sexual power. I never said that ALL women have sexual power. Of course women can wield sexual power and other forms of power also. The combination is particularly potent.

I just left @veralynn a long comment response. If you'll read it you'll have a better idea where I'm coming from.

I wasn’t trying to say that you implied women ONLY have sexual power or that ALL women have sexual power. I was just trying to say as a woman OR as a man if you choose to wield a certain power over others, then people may come to expect that particular thing from you and see you as rather one-dimensional. Not just referring to sexual power here.

Got it. And agreed!

BTW, I use all caps from time to time only for emphasis. I don't intend to shout. I've not mastered Markdown yet and I can never remember how to italicize or bold things, but hitting caps lock is just a pinky move away.

Single * around your text italicizes, double ** gives you bold.

No worries. I took it as emphasis, not as shouting.