Shiro: Little Dog in the Supermarket, a True Story

We brought a new puppy home last Sunday. She is adorable and cute and playful and smart and quickly (thank god) learning not to explosively shit the kennel. Yay, the joys of a puppy adjusting to a new home. And she and my 3 year old dog, Shiro, get along great. I never thought I would see Shiro be so patient.

A week later, I had a great idea. It was getting late and I was alone watching the dogs. I needed to run to the grocery store “real quick”. Why not bring both dogs and see how they do alone in the car? Best. Idea. Ever.

I loaded everyone up. The pups were stoked for the car ride. Upon my arrival at the store, I decided to confine the puppy to a limited area of the truck. Ya know, in case she decided to pee, poop, chew, etc., I wanted to limit her radius of destruction.

I then make my first mistake: I opened the back door.

As soon as I open the door, Shiro saw my focus. It was on the puppy. He took advantage of my moment of weakness and bolted. I called for him. He gave no fucks. He was on an adventure and was well aware that I would be occupied with the puppy long enough to pee on at least three new things. That little shit. NEVER in the year I have owned him has he done this. The one thing he is always well behaved about is staying in the car until I invite him out. Maybe he is feeling like the puppy has stealing his attention and is acting out. Who knows.

I looked at the single leash in the truck and realize mistake number two: I only brought one leash for two dogs. Do I quickly clip the puppy to it to limit her potential radius of destruction or take it to retrieve the loose beast? I elected for option A and clipped the puppy in as she, too tried to make a jump for it. I caught her mid-flight and secured her in the truck and turned my attention to Shiro, who is now no where in sight.

I walked toward the store. Did I mention it was 10 pm and I am wearing my bright plaid pajamas? An employee approached me. “Are you looking for a dog?” He asks. “Well, yes, as a matter of fact I am!” I respond. What gave it away? The look of horror on my face?

He informs me that the dog is in the store.

I walked through the arctic entry, hoping Shiro has stopped there. I saw no signs of him. I proceeded past the carts and into the store. I stopped to look around. To the left is the clothing section, to the right is produce. I thought “What would Shiro do?” My thoughts were interrupted. A lady had spotted my hesitation and asked if I am looking for a dog. Yes, I am. She pointed me to the clothing section.

I proceeded with caution, wading through racks of clothing, calling for my dog. Did I mention there were a hell of a lot of people shopping at 10 pm? Of course, there is no answer. Dammit Shiro, just when I think I know you and your behaviors you pull this shit.

Finally, I heard the familiar rattle of his tags. I walked toward the sounds. I saw a family walking out of the shoe section, holding Shiro by his collar. The little boy stated how much he likes the “cute puppy.” as I made awkward eye contact with the woman holding him. She acknowledged my ownership of the rogue dog and handed him over.

I turned around to retrace my path back to the truck. Shiro and I weaved through the crowds (why are so many people here at 10 pm??) He tried to sniff all the grocery bags on the way out. Luckily, he limited himself to just sniffing and did not try to pee on anything in the store. I made it back to the truck.

Miraculously, the puppy had not destroyed anything, peed, or taken a shit in my 5 minutes of absence. I opened the door and sternly told Shiro to get his ass in the truck as I again catch the puppy mid-air as she again tries to jump out.

Clearly all involved parties need some significant training in car manners. The puppy needs cars 101: how to properly get in and out of the car. Shiro also needs a refresher on that. He also needs cars 201: Not being an asshole when an untrained puppy is involved.

10 minutes later, the dogs were contained and I was on my way into the store to make my purchase "real quick".