My top ten British moments during a heatwave.

1.Complain, complain and complain. Are you even British if you do not complain about the weather? My friends and I whatsapp each other and literally the first sentence is- HOW HOT IS IT! I CAN'T HANDLE THIS HEAT!!!!!! In capital letters too.

2.London Underground. Have you experienced the tube in London when it's above 77 degrees fahrenheit outside and probably 150 degrees on the tube? Actually let me re-frase that, have you travelled on the Bakerloo line (brown line that travels through central london) during a heatwave, because if you have you'll probably empathise as it's hell. And it stinks. Who need's a spa?

3.White people turn into drum stick lollies. This is me at the moment, pink and white.

4.Beer garden. Every beer garden in London is packed after 5pm during the week and most of the weekend. People try to find a way to the bar using a sat-nav.

5.Seaside. Do not attempt to visit any seaside close to London on the weekend during a heatwave, such as Brighton, Margate and Southend. Especially if you have children. You cannot see any sand only swarms of drumsticks every where.

6.Fans. Every electronic fan in Britain has probably sold out by now. On the first day of the heatwave everyone panics and buys a fan. There was a heatwave last year so where are your fans? Do people chuck them out as soon as the weather changes?

7.Newspapers. British newspapers make me roar with laughter every time theirs a heatwave. This is the hottest day in Britain since records began or it's hotter than Spain, Italy, Thailand and a furness.

8.Men walking around with no tops on. And it's always the ones experiencing a mid-life crises that do this.

9."Quick Sally, get the BBQ you out." Three hours later, pisses down with rain.

10.When the heatwave stops and the weather turns chilly, guaranteed every Britain will complain and wish it was hot again.

Image credits: The Star newspaper, Jantoo cartoons, google images, eatslowwalkfast.com, static-standard.com