My Best Friend Understands - Comedy Open Mic Round28 Entry1
Lately, I've been questioned about the source of my drinking problem and because I'm a straight to the point kind of person, here goes:
Well, wouldn't you, if your man looks better in lingerie than you?!!
I mean, isn't it bad enough that @amirtheawesome1 has bigger boobs than I do? While I drown my sorrows with my best friend, Jim, I call on @traf/ @trafalgar to do an entry for #comedyopenmic cuz I think he'd totally rock a lingerie. I also nominate @dj123 as I'd like to see Buddha in lingerie tell a joke.
Click To Vote @ComedyOpenMic For Witness And Disrupt The Steem Blockchain With Laughter!
Thank you to @matytan for the great banner
Hi take5,
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)
Judges:
If you have any questions or queries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: Click Here
Thank you to @matytan for the great banner
That is a big problem, but at least you can exchange the lingerie, like good girlfriends
That’s f’d up, turtles can’t breathe when they’re on their backs.
Haha, that picture along with this comment made my day. I almost squirted my drink from my nose.
I hope you actually did but didn't wanna say
😁
As far as I can see, drinking seems to be the solution.
The only problem is after a couple of drinks, he looks even better :'(
You're drinking the right stuff then.
I don’t think so.
I’m pretty sure she’s drinking pee.
Actually I know it’s pee.
That guy told me.
Literally.
He said “Now that I look like the kind of guy that wants to watch girls drink my pee, I think I am the kind of guy that wants to watch girls drink my pee. I’m gonna give her my pee to drink.”
Sorry to be telling you like this. I’m sure you need a drink now.
Why don’t you come get this Imperial Pale Ale that I poured for you to...
Ok fine, this is just pee too.
Dammit.
I’d like to point out that before I edited that reply it originally had a typo that read, “Now that I look like the kind of guy that wants to watch girls drink my ore...” which, if I’m being honest, is a way better story.
Because all you’d be able to picture is this, like, wealthy old timey steel magnate with a monocle and pocket watch who likes to go out to the mines that he owns dressed up like a lady so that he can smelt some ore and see if he can get any of the poverty stricken miners’ wives to drink it.
I'd rather drink your pee than imagine that scenario
I definitely need a drink now. Where's that bottle of
peewhiskey I've been saving for times like these?I have it right here...in my pants.
No, like, literally, I keep a bottle of pee in my pants. My company does a lot of random drug testing.
Ah, that explains the bulge. I thought you were happy to see my partner in matching undergarments.
Welcome to Jokerland.
Ha ha ha. I didn’t know there was such a thing!
awww he bringing thexthy back!
Beer googles ... ..
Ha ha ha ha excellent
Thats funny men boobs lol