My Haptonomical Experience

Before becoming pregnant, in my period "I want to become a mother and I'm interested in everything to do with motherhood". We have heard quite a lot about haptonomy.

The wikipedia page defines it this way:"Haptonomy is a recent practice dealing with affectivity, or laws that govern emotional mechanisms especially in interpersonal relationships. The practice of haptonomy consists in entering into a relationship through touch, emotional-psycho-tactile contact (this is a relational and tactile approach that never directs, never submits, but guides, accompanies, supports).
In its implementation, it is not a type of therapy, but a method that aims to relax and facilitate healing and understanding through touch. It is mainly practiced in the neo-natal setting (perinatal accompaniment, first contacts of the newborn), sometimes also in the end-of-life care of elderly people.
Haptonomy is a trademark, and there are no specific regulations. Since I wanted Man to be involved in my pregnancy and haptonomy is the only preparation for pregnancy that gives a real place to the future father.

So, the first two sessions were more or less fun: the Man and I got massages and we learned how to "call" (i. e. bring the little tadpole that was going to become our daughter under our hand). But then it went bad.

First, on several occasions the nice lady (who wasn't really mean, by the way) made remarks about my weight gain. On the other occasions, I left the session crying.

And then, the sessions were transformed into "nothing"sessions. Each time we did the same thing: Scramble (very pleasant, but it's not a technique specific to haptonomy), call the baby and "rocking". For an hour, it's a long time. We stopped two months before the birth (that's why we had been practicing for 3 months, since haptonomy starts very early).

For the next baby, I think we'll put the hapto techniques back into practice, but with the help of Frans Veldman's book (creator of the discipline). In reality, I can't really know if it was our haptonoma that wasn't very good or if haptonomy is just that: touching a belly in a certain way, without there being thousands of ways to do it. In which case, I do not see the point of being accompanied by a third party.

I prefer to be quiet with my man to practice in total privacy without being disturbed by promiscuity with a stranger who made me feel really uncomfortable (the fact of being in underwear facing the haptonome disturbed me much more than in front of a doctor).

And did you try haptonomy? How did you feel about that?