RE: Simple Secrets to Happiness #9: YOU CAN'T DO IT ALONE
Hey @allforthegood,
Whilst I LOVE your current happiness series and the positive vibe it brings to the table, I personally disagree with the idea of being unable to find happiness alone.
Truly, if you want to be happy, you need others to serve and to love. If you want to feel loved and accepted, you’ll need to let others in.
Pure unconditional love is somewhat the key to happiness. This can be for others, but it is also for nature, life, and most importantly yourself. Mediation is a great tool in finding or understanding this love. If you base your happiness on the judgement of others and of yourself, you will be stuck in a doubtful foggy mindset, always wondering whether you are reaching expectations, rather than living in the moment and devouring every beautiful aspect of it.
Our lives are completely based on the self. It is the self who breathe's in air. It is the self that beat's it's own heart. It is the perspective of self that determines love and hate - therefore it is only you who can determine your own happiness.
I absolutely agree that you cannot base your happiness on the judgement of others, on what they think about you. And, if we are in chaos within, there is no amount of external help that is going to fill a void within us.
However, when it comes to achieving goals, there is much to be said in being accountable to others, and having the caring support of others. And, I believe that being in community is a key to happiness in that it provides an opportunity to feel of use-- to be able to bring something of value to someone else, and to care for them, does create a measure of happiness.
And, there is, I believe, happiness gained when we do trust and open ourselves up, and feel understood. It's hard to feel accepted, if I have guardedly communicated with others or have kept to myself.
However, I am writing this as a happiness "secret" not a "law." I think the tools I'm sharing are beneficial as ideas to improve one's intentions towards happiness, but won't guarantee it either way. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, and for reading my series :)