Conditions for marriage

There are many signs that indicate the readiness of either a wife-to-be or a husband to be for marriage.

1. Physical Fitness: This is one of the conditions for readiness for marriage. Both the man and the woman must be sure that they are physically fit for the marriage. They have to disclose their health conditions to each other. If they are still willing to marry after the disclosure, they can go ahead to marry, but if not such marriage may not take place.
   It is better to break up during the courtship stage than for them to divorce after marriage.
   That is why it is said that "broken relationships or courtship is better than broken marriage". Both the man and the woman may visit the hospital to carry out some tests to be sure of their health status before marriage. This will enable them to know how to take care of themselves if they decide to marry.

2. Psychological Fitness: This relate to the human mind. Both the man and the woman have to be psychological mature and ready. This means they must be able to make decisions on their own and not driven by emotions. They must understand the meaning and essence of what they want to go into: that is, marriage. They must be ready to agree together.

3. Physiological Fitness: This has to do with the physical maturity of the man and the woman. It will lead to the function of their body structure, especially the reproductive organs. This has more to do with the age than shape or looks. For instance a female may have a big body but she may not be mature enough in terms of her age and reproductive organs. If she marries, she is likely to damage her reproductive organs and that can affect her for the rest of her life. That is why it is good to be mature before marriage, fully ready to handle responsibilities.

4. Mutual Love: The husband-to-be and the wife-to-be must love each other. Love is a strong feelings of deep affection for another person, in this case your partner. This is very important because mutual love can determine the success or failure of the marriage.

5. Social Stability: The man and the woman to marry each other are also expected to be socially stable and compatible ( that is, they must be able to live together). They must understand the traditions and Customs guiding marriage in their Society.

6. Financial Readiness: Marriage carries financial cost and the wife-to-be and the husband to be must be ready to carry the financial burden during and after the marriage. The man must have a reliable source of income because he is expected to be the breadwinner. This does not mean the wife-to-be has to be idle. Marriage is a collective responsibility. The man and the woman need to pool their financial resources together to provide the basic needs such as food, clothing and shelter for the good of the family.

7. Consent or Approval of both families: It is important that the families of the husband to be amd wife to be know everything about the marriage plans. Thier approval before marriage has to be sought by the man and woman. If either of the parents disagrees, the marriage may not hold. However, if the man or the woman or both of them insist on going ahead with the marriage, it may fail. It is advisable that you inform your parents whenever you are ready to marry and make sure you get thier approval if you want to enjoy your marriage.

The effect of lack of Readiness in a marriage relationship

Having considered conditions for readiness for marriage, we shall go further to discuss the effect of lack of Readiness on a marriage relationship. The effect of lack of Readiness on a marriage are as follows:

1. Constant Disputes: The husband and the wife may continue to fight after marriage because they failed to meet some of the conditions for readiness for marriage. For example, husband and wife without mutual love for each other can easily disagree on minor issues that could be settled amicably.
   Sometimes lack of financial capability to bear marital responsibilities can lead to regular fight between husband and wife. Also if either of these spouses has a physical disability which is not disclosed before marriage and the other spouse later discovers, it can lead to fights.

2. Psychological problem: When there is constant fighting and no mutual love in the family. The husband and wife may not trust each other again. When there is distrust, they are not likely to discuss important issues to each other. This can result in loneliness. Loneliness in the family can lead to psychological problems and stress.

3. Broken home/divorce: When husband and wife engaged in constant fighting, the marriage may not last. The two of them can decide to stop living together and separate from each other. They may decide to put an end to their marriage, this is called divorce.

4. Lack of peace and happiness: When two people get married when they are not ready, it can lead to quarrels and fightings. This in turn can lead to a great deal of unhappiness for the man and the woman. The man may even start avoiding the home because the home is no longer a place of peace and happiness for him.

5. Lack of conducive environment for child upbringing: When couples are constantly facing marital difficulties because they were not ready or prepared before they got married, this is bound to affect the proper upbringing of their children. It can lead to unhappy childhood for the children and other problems such as poor performance in school, bullying and fighting. Such children also have the tendency to have wrong notions about what marriage is.

Homework task

1. List and explain 5 conditions for marriage
2. List and explain 5 effect of lack of readiness to marriage.
3. What can you say about your parent's marriage.

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Written by @udyliciouz

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