RELATIONSHIP: FINDING LOVE WHEN YOU'RE NOT LOOKING

So i started dating this amazing young lady who I have known for quite so time now around January this year. We were coursemates for about four years and never in that time did I have an inkling that we would ever be in a relationship. Till date, I am trying to wrap my head around it and I am certain the few people who know us are surprised as well.

I think I wrote an article a couple of months before we started dating that I wasn't prepared for any romantic entanglement for several reasons. For example, I have never been in a relationship for more than a month majorly because I am always falling deeply in love with people who aren't even sure about how they feel about me and that's one of the dangers of being the one making the first step. Fortunately, this time I wasn't the one making the first step. Like I said earlier it happened in a very strange way. Not as romantic and intense as I would have liked. It seemed more like a transaction than a romantic endeavour but it worked.

When I started dating my girlfriend I won't say I loved her because I wasn't emotionally attached to her which was strange because in my previous relationship I was usually head over heels even before the relationship was an actual thing. So it was a strange and new approach which I was excited about now. I learnt to love her over time.

It is roughly seven months--the longest I have ever been with anyone and things are a lot different now than they were a couple of months back. I have come to love this amazing person and it is turning out to be the best relationship I have ever had. I can't speak for her but for myself, I know she is the one I want to build the rest of my life with. It is not a hasty decision or one influenced by emotions. She is someone I can actually be happy with. We are two seemingly different people and we don't even agree on a lot of things but I have noticed how patient I am with her and for many who know me, patience isn't one of my many virtues. I am a very intuitive/impulsive person, so for the simple fact that I can be patient with someone, especially in intense moments is enough reason to follow this to the very end. In addition, she genuinely cares about me and that's something I cannot say, with certainty, about anyone I have dated.

Another thing I do appreciate about my current relationship is that it isn't suffocating. I have been in love with people I have felt like I was trying to possess and most times it left me feeling needy. That hasn't been the case here. I have time for everything and I haven't felt like I am doing too much. We've not lost our essence. We are both adults with our own goals and I think every relationship should be that way. People fall in love and lose themselves. I don't think that's the case here. In the event that something happens and we are no longer together, I don't think we would feel cheated in any way.

The essence of this post is that you can find love when or where is least expect it. All my life I have been searching for love and the moment I stopped it found it. It found in the least way or place I would ever expect and I will very fortunate.

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