ᔕᑕᗷ Elections

in ᔕᑕᗷ ᗰOᑎKEY ᗷᑌᔕIᑎEᔕᔕ3 months ago (edited)

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EᒪEᑕTIOᑎ ᖴEᐯEᖇ

Do you feel excited yet? Are you also always looking forward to the elections? Adrenaline and that kind of stuff (being noticed if you line up and wait till...)
A wonderful time when you are kept busy by the government, distracted by wars, hell, damnation, and of course the melting of the ice cap despite the fact that we all have to heat the place and the Adriatic sea is frozen. Gas is scarce because the pipelines have been blown up by senile leaders of countries whose strings are pulled by...

By whom? We haven't figured it out. If I may believe the stories, it is the Jews, while other voices whisper that Vatican City still rules and pulls the strings (Rome again!), only in a different guise. Both versions sound credible. I still remember very well how a pope shouted that all homosexuals should be thrown off the church tower. Interesting in itself if you consider that the average spiritual leader does not take choirboys very seriously and cannot keep his hands to himself.
Old people with prejudices rule, that is clear, the question is why? When it comes to Ursula von der Leyen (indeed not an old man but an old woman) it is because she is a scion of a German company that knew and was prepared for the fact that the covid virus would be announced. I did not know that she also had a crystal ball like me, but she has, and if not spies. This iron lady knew that she would not be elected but when it comes to elections it does not matter. It is more of a show to keep the common people busy and to have them turn up to put a cross next to a name after which the ballot paper is thrown away. Aaaah Ursula.. you look a bit like Medusa, although this "imaginary" figure from Disney is in all probability also a prediction about how it will go in an unfair fight. Still, I like Medusa way more than you, can be because you hug with Klaus (where does he hide right now or should I ask what's he up to?).

Distraction is good, being distracted is better if you have something on your record. Let's be honest, how many people with the right to vote and have access to the internet or have at least been to school do research? Is it 1 percent or 5? The nice thing about politics is that everyone knows that a politician lies. Nevertheless, people vote en masse for those with the biggest mouth or rather the promise that they want to hear even if it is not in black and white.

If you all vote for me, I am your favourite candidate and most decent one, and I win the election, next year after the ruling party has fallen and you have all been chipped and your savings have been transferred to my bank account in Switzerland, you will get a holiday to Australia, New Zealand or Canada. Great countries where they know everything about freedom of speech. In addition, there is beautiful nature and you can breathe freely in the many internment holiday camps that are even virus-free. No diarrhea or problems for the rest of your life
I would say, everyone vote for me, don't be an idiot and go for a better life.

The Party
It's All the Same to Me

This letter is addressed to you dear admirer, you won't see my signature because it's electronically generated but therefore as valid as in the code of political law and average excepted nonsense is stated in code number 666 article 99, 9th paragraph the 666th word.



Prompt: A Speech - @freewritehouse
@grebmot @eveetim @jiya99 @fadthalib
21.8.24
Fancy Letters


#freewrite #speech #elections #chat #forum #opinion #steemexclusive #creativewriting

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 3 months ago (edited)

Oh what a topic . I always want to vote but have no Id card yet . I want sometimes to go and vote but the reality seems so exhausted what the politians say . Mostly did nothing just say the big words . Some get debt from other countries just say 10 crore and spend 2 crore to our country and where are Lefted 8 crore? The silly people don't think where that money come from . They are just happy by some convenience . But don't think we are drowning under debth . Sad reality .

I like the spectacle of it all. It's a wonderful waste of time providing a meal ticket to all kinds of colorful characters. A bit like Wrestlemania, but with less believable acting and more outlandish plotlines. Later in the locker room Hulk Hogan and the Iron Sheik congratulate eachother and shotgun a few beers before melting away into the night. Then the cycle continues.

Who's pulling the strings? Not sure. I think there's lots of people who think they do and might to a certain degree. Ultimate it seems more like some kind of evolutionary mechanism, or some sort complex group dynamic. You know, selecting for the kind of opportunistic turbo-weasels narcissistic enough to run for public office in the first place. Or the kind of persons who aspires to be unelected bureaucrats. You name it.

Oh, kinda half related. Found a page of some unnattributed satire floating about. I remember it circulating a few years ago and liking it enough to bother printing it out:

The Night before the Oklahoma rally I met with my campaign manager, Robby Mook. Robby was in charge of the campaign computers, but he was so smart in many ways he was like a computer. He had bad news. "Oklahomans see you as an aloof New York intellectual," he explained. "They'll never vote for someone like that. You need an image they can understand and respect."
"What if I ate a big hunk of beef on stage?" I helpfully suggested. "We need to think bigger," said Robby. "I've consoluted the Algorithm. It told me that Oklahoma voters love cowboys I liked where this was going. "It also told me that what they hate most is ... cattle rustlers."
"Robby, you're a genius," I said. We spend that night crafting my new persona, a persona we believed would win me the election. The next day, I sauntered onto an Oklahoma stage wearing a full cowboy outfit, firing a pair of six shooters in the air. "Howdy," I said to the crowd, "I'm Sherrrif Hillary." I received the biggest applause of my whole career.
"If there's one thing I hate," I announced, "it's varmints. And the worst varmints of all are cattle rustlers. Make me your president and I'll put a bullet between the eyes of every rustler in this state. " For Emphasis, I bit a chunk out of a hunk of beef.
The crowd roared. They loved it. A chant started: "Death to rustlers! Death to rustlers!" Then a scuffle broke out in the front row. Three men dressen in denim tackled an hogtied a small, weasely-looking fellow. They dragged him up on stage.
"Ms. Clinton," one man said, "this fella here is a rustler. He stole three of my prize cows last spring. If you kill him right now, everyone in this room will vote for you. The crowd began a new chant: "Blood! Blood! Blood!"
The bound man pleaded with me. "Yes, I stole those cows," he said, "but I only did it because my family was starving. Please, spare me. I'll never rustle again." My life and career have been defined by hard choices. This was perhaps the hardest choice of all. My phone buzzed. A text from Robby. It read, "The Algorithm says: the rustler dies." "I'm sorry," I told the man as I raised a pistol "It's not me. It's the Alorithm."
I squeezed the trigger

I love it! Still don't know if it's from an actual book just a commendable piece of literary forgery supposed to mock political biographies. Either way I'm still getting a kick out of reading it and felt like sharing it.

 3 months ago 

It looks like it's from a book and this part (2 pages) are on Steemit!

https://steemit.com/life/@blakemiles84/clinton-book-excerptish-the-cattle-rustler

It sounds satire to me.

Neat! Only have that page shot as a print-out. It's great writing imo.

Upvoted! Thank you for supporting witness @jswit.