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RE: The Dinner Party (Cosmic Reverberations)

in The Ink Well • 4 years ago

This is a very poignant story, @raj808. There's a lot going on and I had to lock on to keep following at times through first person/third person shifts, but you harness it all and bring it on home with the way the main character connects with Charley in the end. I love how you show two characters having taken different forks in the road - and how that diversion split them in terms of their life choices and how their lives panned out, but not the bond they share, which is unbreakable through everything. Abi is a great character too, and I really loved how she developed through the story. Nice work!!

4 years ago in The Ink Well by
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     4 years ago 

    I had to lock on to keep following at times through first person/third person shifts, but you harness it all and bring it on home with the way the main character connects with Charley in the end.

    Lol, you hit the nail on the head from an editors perspective here jayna. I actually spent the same amount of time editing this to try and make sure the POV issues, although evident, were a literary device and not just a mistake.

    I needed it to jump from the different character's view point to really get accross what I wanted to express, but I'm aware it is something that is advised against even to first time novelists lol

    I love how you show two characters having taken different forks in the road - and how that diversion split them in terms of their life choices and how their lives panned out, but not the bond they share, which is unbreakable through everything.

    Thanks, this story is so personal to me. There are aspects of both Row and Charley in me and my history. I wish it weren't so sometimes, and I certainly wish that I had Row's life, although maybe living in a luxury place in the wilderness instead.

    Abi... is my perfect woman ;-)

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