Reflections from Life on the Streets

in #inspiration8 years ago (edited)

With love from Brook

Previous post:
https://steemit.com/homeless/@brookdemar/homeless-but-steemit-welcomed-me  
Inches from Death

Several months ago I was in front of CVS pharmacy and I noticed a blue nylon bag by itself in a planter box by a tree. No one was around so I thought somebody left something behind or something and I looked inside and it was a five dollar bill and some little radio inside. I looked around and it seemed to just to be abandoned by itself. This guy comes out of this store 6'7" I'd seen him before, another homeless person. He started yelling at me, "leave that bag alone, put that five dollars back, that's mine" and I left it there and he was inside the doorway of the store. He came right out. I left it in the bag and I stood up, and he stood in front of my face, about 3 inches away and was yelling at me schooled me left to right. I wouldn't back down, I just kept staring him down and looking at him, and he didn't like that at all. So he backs off of me for a second, and he yells out and says, "I'm going to kill you". He reached underneath his shirt and pulled out a 12 inch blade, knife, and he proceeded to plunge it forward and about two inches from my heart I backed off like to the left and missed the blade by just a couple inches or so, he almost went through my chest. He pulled the knife back. He didn't go into a frenzy or run after me or try and kill me. He had stopped at that point. I turned around and went back to my car with my friend. I told the police by kmart, I found an officer, and he was going to check the area. He asked me to wait a half an hour. I waited as long as I could, and no one came back. Nothing came out of this event. I was just told if I ever saw the guy again, I should call the police. Next time I saw him I called the police but they didn't arrest him or nothing. Next time I saw him he started bobbing his head back and forth, he's some gang guy, he says, "don't call the police, don't call the police." He was getting wound up, so he knew I called the police. I saw him another time at night, he was drunk and he was walking towards me where I was holding my sign. I can hold up a sign sometime, even though I got hurt from my job. He started spurting off, "I've got a gun in my purse", he had this draw string thing he calls a purse. He started talking about his gun, but I tried to be cool. I just knew better and to shut up and wait until he goes away.

Day to Day

People have given us money. One time I was sitting in our car, and a man walked by the front. He stopped and kinda did a double take or something, and pulled out his wallet and gave me a brand new hundred dollar bill, and said please go take your friend to breakfast, buy her a breakfast and I did. I went to stacks and I bought a big breakfast for my friend Katherine. Money helps. People give us a bag of incidentals, tooth paste, sock rolls, candy bar things like this. Creature comforts of the word of the lord, and tell me god still loves us, or maybe a go between person when your faith is weary and wavering and you're not sure where you stand. You're so down graded in the streets and feel so hopeless, and you don't count. Sometimes we get food from the dumpster. I guess when you come around full circle about this and you don't know if you're gonna make it or not, the horror stories, the shelter stories, people just take money, a lot of abuse goes on in the system. The best people do for us is leave us alone. I go to a dumpster to eat, and when people leave us alone and we try to survive that way it really helps. When people just go on by and don't judge you.

Fixing the cracks

There needs to be a support system like for FEMA or somebody for injured or homeless people to get emergency debit card or something to stay alive. The police have a problem with you signing. If they don't like you signing they going to give you a ticket which costs three or four hundred dollars. If you get three or four tickets in a row you go to jail. It seems like the police are the last line to decide whether you should live or die. To sign to beg for money to get something to eat. It's perplexing, on one hand maybe the society thinks there's a lot of outlets to get help with agencies. A lot of that is a fallacy, it's kind of a scam, and it kind of pertains to a small sect of a bell shaped curve. For instance, a lot of folks they need money, they can't get a job, their condition, there's no home, it piles up on them. There's either crime or there's signing they might sell drugs who know what goes on.
 
The key thing is it's hard to survive to keep you alive. Water, food, basic life supports. One thing that is starting to turn around about for the positive point, is little miniature homes are being built like pods for people who are homeless in Seattle and Portland. Whether or not that would take off down here, remains to be seen. I don't really envision that. It requires land, property, sanitation, police. It's like this small community of problems itself. Maybe the pressure of crime and stuff would be lifted a bit.

People resort to stealing and all kinds of things to survive, that are homeless. There's a big cross section there. Even one guy said in the morning in the men's bathroom some of us used, "I told my woman, if you steal from me I'll kill you. Well I caught her stealing from me and I killed her." These people are cold, a lot of them are ruthless, they got nothing to lose and everything to gain. They will do whatever they have to do to protect their life. Stealing, breaking and entering, whatever they gotta do to get whatever they need. If they had an emergency card as a debit card to survive that would be one thing. Not free but something interjected in the system as far as emergency help for people. Like burned up people, tornado victims, they get help, they get help from FEMA, they get this, they get that, well we got a sect of society that needs money help, they need food, clothing, shelter, a tent, a sleeping bag, somewhere to roust. Sure some drink beer this and that, it helps alleviate the problem, and shows part of the solution. They won't go to the shelter, there's so many rules, they pick on you, they're weird to you, they just won't go. It's not that the help isn't there, but it's not a 100% full proof system. The mental health money is not there. The hospitals. It's a thousand dollars a day. They're not going to put people on a hold just cause they look mental. There's a lot of issues.  

note from assistant:
@creationlayer I've transcribed this story over the phone. We'll be setting up Brook with a laptop this week. Beyond helping a homeless person out, I genuinely think Brook has some good stories to share, and my goal is ideally he can be autonomous and use steem.it as he continues on his path. If we can take a homeless person off the street and teach him steem.it the possibilities are endless. He's saving now for a motor home, and a place to park/live. With your support in only a couple weeks we may take a homeless person off the street give them a home, and get them started writing for steemit. I am in the process of getting the first funds to Brook, converted SBD and will get cash as soon as possible. I have been providing some of the basics and helping out as you can see with the previous posts, but Bitcoin is slow to USD as most of you know, and he doesn't want one of those debit cards. I will post an update when that occurs, as we open him a bank account and pay off his small debt to the bank. Until I setup his computer I'll transcribe his stories. Thank you all for your support.    

There were some questions about the validity of my account. Here is a PGP signed message for verification.    

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I am Creationlayer on Steemit  
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http://pgp.mit.edu/pks/lookup?op=get&search=0x64D39F83BFBC3C8

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@brookdemar, this story is incredible. I honestly don't know what to say that could properly express the feelings I feel having read it...I must say, I truly feel like no response is actually worthy of this - you're legitimately living a life that even the vast majority of us on Steemit fear: the struggle, the severity of what you've undoubtedly already gone through...If (and when) you post again, I swear to you: I will legitimately follow (and upvote) any and every post that I am fortunate enough to see from you.

Please keep fighting. Please hang on. Please. Seriously. I pray others will read your post and do their part to support, as well.

i'll show him comments, we're getting a laptop shortly for him.

Something terrible will happen to it because the guy's got a victim mentality and doesn't seem too sharp. You'd be better off giving the laptop to a poor kid that wants to learn code. This guy gives homefree guys like myself a bad name.

well then find a poor kid, tell his story and make a steemit. You could post comments of judgement, and say what should happen, or you could actually do the work and help someone. Excited to see your post.

Look up my posts. ;) For the last five years, I've been trying to prototype green tech to enable a home free lifestyle that could actually save humanity from itself, all while being homeless and injured.

Building a computer setup that I can use ergonomically is actually the next thing on my project list. It will be an Odroid Xu4 based wearable laptop/smartphone replacement with all open source software and meshnet capability. Once I get it done, I'll be putting open source plans up so home free people all around the world can build one and compute/communicate efficiently and easily.

Every one of the projects I have that keep me up at night when I'm not progressing on them at the pace I'd prefer is designed to free people that can't or won't participate in civilization by showing how to provide them selves with low cost, efficient, transportation, shelter, cooking facilities, water filtration, and communication.

I posted up some blog posts about these ideas and projects but they got buried before anyone saw them.

I know I sound judgemental and harsh but I'm just really tired of the "Why won't someone feed me?" crowd. Where are the families and communities that they should have been building relationships with? I could be "off the streets" in a minute just by contacting friends and family because I've spent my life helping those people. I actually choose to live freely though because it's the only lifestyle I've found that doesn't empower tyrants.

Sorry about rambling on, but this is a topic I'm passionate about. Help those that help others, those that are trying to help themselves, and those that are trying to make the world a better place. Let the people that choose suffering through their ignorance and selfishness suffer their lessons until they learn.

You do not deserve that kind of life, i hope that steemit will still help you.
You are very educated about crypto-currencies and technology, im glad you are living the right life.
Get well buddy, you can go on !

Thanks for sharing, Steemit is an amazing place. Keep some of your Steem invested if possible. It's like company stock that could be worth a lot in the near future. You have my upvote, and I'm following.

that will be up to brook, i'll have to give him the sales pitch. right now he's good with some food. ;)

Sure I completely understand.

I noticed that Brook is badly overweight, obese even. Does that bother anyone else?

Steem is already doing amazing things for people. I don't see why we can't make Brook the first man to be off the streets thanks to the Steem community. I hope Steemit continue to be a platform that can help others in the future. Have my upvote (and I wish I had more to give), and I hope it helps!

oh we're going to do it, we're gonna have a fat steemit sticker on his motorhome, and he's gonna get those speakers he was telling me about so he can listen to his old records. man what a world we're in.

You are an angel.
When I was homeless I asked 100 friends on facebook to borrow me 300. Nothing

I asked the BitShares community and all I got was 25 dollar from dan and 5 of xeroc.

And I was doing so much.

Now this has changed with Steemit.
The greedy bastards are not in full control anymore.

Keep it coming, I always knew that charity is essential to grow a community.

How many times have i tried to convince people to help?

Now they all see how well the people react on it.

While they were stashing away their witness salary and used me.

I am happy that you have gotten help as well. There's plenty of generous votes going around right now, so early adopters are going to found the future.

You mean help when I needed 300 for a room?
No I got 30 dollar of a community with a 50 million marketcap.

Now it's better.
Philantropists are flocking in.

You should have been grateful for the $30 honestly.

I was, I never said that I wasn't

Maybe I shpuld ask people in bitcointalk to lend me 300. I guess I would just feel ashamed for doing so. I bet I wouldn't get a dollar.

@brookdemar this story is impressive and very amazing, at first I thought this was what he meant but after I read and I understand. I salute your posting this, maybe someone else should read this post in order to provide an upvote for you .. thanks for sharing stories on steemit, story is the life story of your best experiences like good or bad it's just you and god knows....

You sir, deserve me upvote. It amazes me to see what a community we built together. We can help people in need and turn this world a little better. If there is anything I can do for Brook send me a message.

I am proud to be part of Steemit. It gives me and many other the opportunity to help people in need.
Thank you for this post and do me a favour.

Never give up.

fully support you and what a great story you have there! lets hope steemit changes more lifes!

Brook is lucky that he has such a great companion. I just hope that he is well, and he can get off the streets soon. Life on the street is tough.

Good luck to @brookdemar, as well as @creationlayer. I appreciate your work.

yea really spending a lot of time with him, takes some guidance to do this right for someone.

It really does. All the best to you buddy.

a very nice story
I am very moved to read this story
great post!
thank you @brookdemar

good share