Defeating Energy Vampires, Boundaries, and "No" Love

in #inspiration7 years ago

I know quite a few people who are self proclaimed people pleasers. They say this with a slight grin, but with a sort of desperation behind their eyes. I am a deep reader of people and energy, so I usually notice this rather immediately. When I come across someone who is willing to open up to me and who may ask how to stop letting people take advantage of them, I offer some very general, loving, but straight forward advice I would like to share that with the STEEMIT community, in hopes of someone coming across this that the needs it.

  1. Have boundaries and stop letting people into your life that just take take take. You need to allow only those people who are willing to sew into you. If their only intent is to stay around and continue to take away from you, you have to release them. As hard as this may be, you must find a way to cut those cords.

  2. Love and support from a distance. We can't always immediately walk away from those we love and care about. If the ones who we care about are the most toxic ones to us, you must practice the art of living them from a distance. Limit the time you spend with them. That doesn't mean spend time alone, it just means find the people who are the most supportive and treat you equally and spend a bit more time around them. If it does then out that you spend more time alone, so be it. You should technically learn to be your own best company.

  3. Learn to say and mean NO. Saying "NO" is so liberating! Meaning it, is even more magical. If you say No, but then you easily go back on your word then people will know that they can still get what they want from you, with just a little passive nudging. This doesn't mean that you are not free to change your mind, but don't let that be a part of someone's selfish negotiating tactics to get what they want from you. Make that decision silently and to yourself if you choose to. If you do, be sure to make the terms of your agreement very clear and be comfortable with asking for something in return. There should always be an equal exchange.

These are just some very basic tips but ones that I think we easily forget all too often in our day to day dealings.
Remember, stand up for yourself. Be comfortable saying "No". Be even more comfortable setting a boundary and cutting cords where necessary.

For more help with this, feel free to reach out to me. Sometimes, it may be a deeper route cause that makes you feel obligated to accept less and give more in your life. That is not an equal exchange of energy. Some people are definitely energy vampires and you must learn the art of dealing with them accordingly.

#FromShaylaWithLove

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