introduce yourself

i just ten thousands of time wrote and erase to introduce myself like a lost .i cant describe myself well the judgment is yours
im 24 yer old persian girl in a good family..with some limits ..and as a girl in here i break the rules by anarchy and push the limits to be me
art is something inside and u make it come true ..like a wish and it shows itself by creativity
like some creatures in your mind
i used to talk by myself in childhood .and my mom thought i was crazy but the Dr. said shes not
i started graphic design in high school after 2 years i got rank 9 in entrance exam of a art college in tehran
college was'nt so bad but its not what i expected about a art school or classes in a college
i just found few good n high level masters at there to ask them to teach me the way of learning and doing art
when i found college unusefull for myself i started music in Tehran Conservatory Of Music
my instruments was guitar electric and piano..and another lessons like physics of sound..poem classes are the favorites we talk about myths .. poetry ..poets like Rumi Mowlana Ferdowsi and other stories bout them
the decisions are the most important results in everyones lives..that make them succesful people or not
may my decisions pushed me to walk on many different ways but at least i've walked on many different ways that not ma way to succes
after that i went to my hometown in a lil town in the middle of here
i got sick and deppressed cause of having no masters classes job and a good social position
i just lookin for a cure for myself because no one could help me for a great move
next move was growing a psychedelic plant with the several good peculiarities..the marijuana
before that i knew what was that but the planting experiment was unique and i wish some day make my own phantom farm of powerful plants
the plants are so intelligent
i could talk with she and she could response like a human with no shape of it ..that cosmic plant helped me to passing through the bullshit times of depression and so as magic mushrooms does
my philosophy of existence of god was changed from atheism to god and that was unique too
and I never read Bertrand Russell's books again
on that times of high school we used to took pictures with analog cameras the frames the analog shutters the darkroom with that red light
after the digital cameras revolution the darkrooms was haunted places
i interested in photography either ..the lil creatures in nature is so interesting the feeling of a sunset is interesting the feeling between two or thousands of humans is interesting
i captured too many feelings too many places too many people in my world
and i wanna go to the unseen places to see and record them and maybe share with the rest of the world or show them to my grand children or in a great or small exhibitions
i didnt found my path yet it seems but some day soon will be
there are too many things that better left unsaid