Normalizing the White Lie, Stockholm Syndrome, and The Way Back to Healthy Truth
Every morning the majority of people in this country wakes up and starts lying. Throughout the day people build cases to support their lies, like they’re playing a game of chess against a feeling that they aren’t consciously aware of that is trying frantically to tell them, they are in fact lying to themselves.
I am no different although I tell myself I am different, when I also struggle immensely to even change small habits. I would argue that the habits I allow myself are ones that do not corrupt my individual sovereignty for group think dynamics that has created a nationwide epidemic of Stockholm Syndrome. But there I go building the case for a lie. Of course I should really be living outside growing food and interacting with nature, doing yoga, and meditating all day. This very act of sitting a foot in front of a bright screen is terribly unhealthy. And yet I still do it a lot and tell myself it’s ok. For me at this point in my life, I would love for someone to be able to remind me when I’m lying to myself, and helped these lies get obliterated. But I realize that most of you are not in much of a position to do so, because you’re suffering from your own case of screen addiction, and telling yourselves that it’s ok. And with most people destroying a lie can create a very messy situation.
If someone in an audience at a magic show smugly tells the crowd the science of the trick the magician is performing, the crowd would be very upset. They paid to play the part of being mystified. They do not want the experience ruined.
The magic show ends, the people go home in cars they should not drive, to homes they should not have, and eat food they should not eat. And sit in front of screens that they should not be sitting in front of so often. And they’ll tell themselves it’s ok. Yet if someone were to explain to them all the reasons why these innocent activities are actual abusively harmful when put in the larger framework of it being a great privilege in time of extreme global inequality mostly perpetuated by the country that allows for this perfect seeming life, it might ruin this parties evening, or week, or month, or however long the takes for them to either forgot or change their life. The magic show we call real life has been temporarily ruined.
I think most people are well enough adjusted to realize at times that there is in fact a lie they are upholding, and they justify it with being the responsible thing to do. This would explain the defensive reactionary outburst that occurs if someone is caught in their lie, as I think silence would be the more natural reaction if you are honestly caught unaware in a lie. But really we’re all liars and most of us know it. We normalize the lies to the point we forget. But we will never really forget, though we will always feign innocence if caught in lying again in our defensiveness.
Many of us are now realizing that lying actually is not the responsible things to do, because we are destroying our habitat through the white lies we tell. But we have all paid into the system. Each of us has done time in our own ways for tickets to the show that will keep our bellies full, and our minds mystified by the flashing screen. It is hard to detach from the magic show. Then I remember the old proverb, “necessity is the mother of invention.” And I remember to be patient.
While it is true that our country is helping to strategically starve whole sovereign nations halfway across the globe in the name of democracy, while turning a blind eye to slave markets in the same region, and the climate scientists forecasts become increasingly grime, and a growing population becomes increasingly vulnerable to a predatory and predator-enabling government, it has taken realizing the sickness within myself to see the necessity that has birthed a more innovative approach to living as a human who likes to eat in America. If I hadn’t become sick, I would still be constantly building the case to uphold the lie that I had forgotten was a lie. And so while I cannot expect my friends in America to overnight become comrades and agree to overthrow this tyrannical leeching government, I will warn you that a time will come when you will have the chance to choose between your health and your lies. And when that time comes, the advice you get from “professionals” will probably be based on lies and a faulty approach to problem solving. And if you take their “expertise,” you might think it is making you healthy. But just like when you lie for so long you forget what the truth is, when you’ve been sick for so long, you forget what health is.
My sickness in a way can also be seen as my blessing. I have an autoimmune disorder that makes me feel like I’ve hit by a semitruck if I make bad choices on just one day. Gradually, I have learned to use myself as a test subject to find what is healthy. No surprise: the key to my health is a low stress lifestyle backed by a diet consisting of at least 80% whole foods, with absolutely no alcohol. I was, however, surprised to learn that all the grains and legumes that made the bulk of my diet up until a year ago, was not in fact healthy. I have since replace grains with greens, roots and squash as my bulk filler foods. The results were significant. It would have saved me from a lot of feeling shitty if someone had explained this to me years ago. But I probably wouldn’t have taken the lesson to heart, like I have been learning through experience.
Being healthy also allows for the cognition to be aware of lies. Since I became healthy again, my life has been in upheaval, as I try to eradicate lying from being habitual. This may seem like a bold and noble journey, but it is allow a fast track to conflicts in a society built upon lies. I see how other people uphold lies clearer and understand the danger of these lies more vividly than ever before, so in social situations I find myself either arguing against the whole room, or holding my tongue at all times with little middle ground. The lies that allow for genocide to take place are disgusting, and we all hold some responsibility for the crimes of our government. The lies that maintain our individual innocence permeate every aspect of our lives. Once we allow ourselves to lie, we no longer have a gauge on truth, and the lies we believe become nastier and nastier. Watching the republicans and democrats reach a point where they will not even speak to each because of the lies each side upholds is evidence of this downward spiral. And when you look at the situation without bias, you see both sides calling foul on their opponents and excuse their side for the exact same things. It’s frustrating to watch friends and family be so blatantly duped.
So while I cannot expect an overnight changes, I will continue to build the case to show how we as a culture have grown quite sick with the lies that have become normalized. And the necessity for invention is already there, if you can manage untangle yourself from your web of lies for just one moment, and remember again what it truly feels like to be healthy. Feeling healthy is a natural and intuitive experience that anyone can grasp. Use it! And gradually begin weeding out all your habits that conflict with this feeling. Future congratulations on your return to health and sanity.