Why People Create Drama and Chaos in their Lives, and What They Can do Instead
Preface
For as long as I can remember, I've been interested in the study of human nature. But that curiosity accelerated when I came across some books in a bathroom.
Neuro-Lingiustic Programming
Years ago, I lived in South Florida. For a few weeks, I stayed at my friend Terri's place, in her spare "art" room. She, Terri, was and is a family counselor. It was her bathroom where I discovered her collection of hardcover books on NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming). The NLP books discussed why-people-do-what-they-do, the patterns they continue to inhabit, and how different people have different sorting styles--ways of accumulating information. I was fascinated. The books were written by John Grinder and Richard Bandler, the founders of NLP.
How I came up with this theory
For the last 4.5 years, I've been working as a BG (BackGround) actor aka "extra" for films and TV shows. My job is simple. Show up. Shut up. Be obedient. For more about my adventures in New York City, visit KrisKemp.com
When we, the BG (BackGround) actors are not on set, we are at holding, a place with chairs and, sometimes, tables. Often, holding is at a church since, during the week, the church is empty. Typically, we sit for hours in holding. This is a good place to people-watch, to learn about human nature. Being at holding, so often, has given me a chance to witness, first hand, how self-destructive and self-sabotaging people can be, or how creative and diligent they can be, depending on where they place their focus.
In a way, holding was a petri dish of human emotions. I noticed that here are a two groups of BG actors in holding.
The dedicated actors
This group spends time pouring over scripts, learning lines, practicing their lines with other actors, reading books on acting, typing their screenplays with their portable keyboards to their iPad or tablet, and making the most of their free time.
The bitter background, the backwash
These BG (BackGround) actors spend hours bitching about everything. Everything is a complaint. They’re usually led by some domineering angry female and her hunched-over army of white knights.
These BG actors have the simplest, most easiest job in the world. Show up, shuttup, be obedient. They have hours of free time to watch educational videos, watch NetFlix, Hulu, Amazon, YouTube, Vimeo videos, watch from hundreds of documentaries. They have hours of free time to read books and learn something they can put to use. They have hours of free time to write their screenplay, novel, draw up a storyboard for their movie idea.
But what do they do? Bitch and moan and complain.
Cannibals versus Creators
These complainers are the cannibals. They are timeworms. They wiggle their way into the apple of your time and leave an empty spot. They are energy vampires. They are parasites.
These dedicated actors, or people who have some kind of passion, are the creators. They offer value to the world by adding value to their own life, through education and action, then adding value to the lives of others with their creation — movie, song, books, art, etc.
The Reason Why People Create Drama and Chaos in Their Life
The Reason Why People End up as Cannibals is the same reason why people create drama and chaos in their life.
The reason why people create drama and chaos in their lives is this: They have not discovered and uncovered their passion.
They have not discovered “what get’s them lit”.
Because they have not discovered their passion, they have no purpose.
Because they have no purpose, they are bored.
This boredom frustrates them to no end, so they do things that will prevent boredom and add excitement to their life.
They complain. They bitch. They moan. They see a crack on the sidewalk and fall into it and pretend it’s the Grand Canyon. They demand a helicopter arrive to save them from the crack.
They major in the minors.
Drama and Chaos
These cannibals create chaos and drama in order to add excitement into their life.
Why?
Because their lives are mundane and boring and predictable. And the drama and chaos they create brings that spark of excitement and unpredictability into their lives.
These cannibals want the same thing as creators — to have a life that’s interesting, unpredictable, exciting, maybe a bit dangerous and uncomfortable at times. They yearn for the feeling that “having a life like this” will bring them.
However, they go about it the wrong way — by creating drama and chaos.
Why? Because they’ve never discovered what “get’s them lit”. They have not discovered their true passion and purpose for living.
Until they do, they will remain cannibals, and the only thing they will leave in their wake is chaos, drama, and confusion, additional residue for them to look back towards and complain about.
The cannibals, the chaos-creators, the drama kings and drama queens, can ameliorate their behavior and change it altogether simply by discovering their own passion, their own purpose for living.
Find your Purpose, Activate your Passion
Everyone, you included, has a gift. Your main action ought to be determining what that gift is, and then asking yourself how you would like to use that gift, in order to add value to your life and add value to the lives of others.
Writing is one of my passions. You can check out my novel here and my ebooks, by visiting my website and clicking on the ebooks link in the top categories section.
What is your passion?
If you do not know what your passion is, send an email, a text, or call ten people that you know. Ask them: “What do you think it is that I’m good at, that I have a natural inclination towards? And what do you think I can do with that, to add value to my life and the lives of others.”
Educate yourself
There is a plethora of free resources online. Simply Google them. YouTube search your interest. You can learn online.
Grab the tools necessary to make your passion happen. For me, it’s a laptop. And tea. Sometimes, coffee. And it’s a keyboard, too.
Make the most of your time by discovering your passion, honing your passion, befriending others who are passionate, and taking action, immediate action to make your dreams real.
For more treats, visit www.KrisKemp.com