How I nearly lost it all as a reckless and naive 'entrepreneur' (a story of struggle and realisations)

A bank account that read -$2,000 and several credit cards maxed out.

That's how my financial situation looked exactly a year ago today, in June 2016. I started out as a digital nomad in 2015 and struggled. I hadn't really worked out my niche in the world. I was shooting from the hip on a ton of different projects. Nothing felt right, but I was still shooting.

I was scraping a few hundred dollars a month from freelance gigs but nothing spectacular.

Money definitely was not flowing.

I'd taken on a contract as a growth marketing apprentice. The pay was fucking terrible. But it was steady and I was super thankful to have some cash coming in that could support me.

This influx of cash and self belief made me get a little arrogant though.

I wanted to run before I could walk in business terms.

Before I'd even won any of my own clients, I took the bold move of quitting the gig and going solo... with $2k in the bank.

Shock, this was not a good decision. This meant that I was peddling like a mad man to make anything work. But nothing was. I am not a designer. Which is funny considering I thought I could start my own design agency (lol). I was foolish and delusional. So far gone that it led me back to my family home with a minus on my bank account and a ton of credit card debt that had bootstrapped me in the 4 months I tried to go it alone.

I remember getting home and feeling so deflated.

"Why didn't I make it work?"

"Did I not work hard enough?"

The truth was, I just wasn't mature enough to work for myself at that point. I didn't have the drive. I hadn't seen the struggle you have to make, to make it happen. I didn't appreciate that success and money don't come overnight.

But you know what?

It was the best lesson I've ever had in my life.

I grew up so much during those shitty times that now, when I'm earning a solid income with several clients, I'm always being a little cautious. I won't let myself get into a vulnerable position again.

It's not made me any less risk-averse. Far from it. In fact, I still love risk as much as I did before. But I don't play around with financial risk as much. At least not without appreciating the consequences.

Thanks for reading my story. I don't usually talk about it, but it's good to get it off my chest.

Who else has had to struggle? And how did you get through it?