My time is coming and I am forever grateful.

in #life7 years ago (edited)

My time as I fight cancer takes a toll mentally and physically on my body and brain. As one who feels that I need to fight and even when I feel a burden you all have come to help me on this journey. Even though I know it is a journey that I cannot win and that a time will come when no longer can my body fight even though my brain wants too. It is honestly my love for @lynncoyle1 ( MY BABYLOOO ) as I have called her since I laid eyes on her that keeps me going. My life has been one of great love from my parents but now they are gone. She has made my life complete and now I am content with the outcome. You see my life with her these last 9 or so years has made my life complete. A life that I can say that made me live again, love again and it's all because of her love and support. I never knew love could play such a role in ones life but it has. We have been basically inseperable 24/7 and with her kids I have a legacy to carry on my values, my ideas and again I can say I am content.

I have to say meeting her was a fluke and the minute I saw her I was breathless,blown away and totally in love. When we met she stood from the table to meet me and at that moment I knew I had to love her, protect her and forever be there for her no matter what the outcome of our first date was. I knew the ravens were telling me she was the one. The one I had waited my whole life for. I need to say that my parents never were close to my ex-wife. They felt she was wrong for me. The day I got married my Mom tried to tell me and believe it or not tried to cancel the wedding and offer to fly or pay any costs if I did not marry her. Well you can see Your MOM is always right LOL. My father just said to my Mom that it was a choice for me and I would have to live with the consequences.

Upon meeting my love we travelled to Ontario, Canada as My father was dieing and my Mom was already gone. We got all my siblings and spent a day with my Dad at the care home but Lynn took special interest in my Dad. When the day ended with what my sister calls Lynns day he whispered in my year that my Mom would be happy as I had fnally found the right one for me. He said to remember mthe Courteau rules to love and most of all respect her and all women in every way. He said he would see Mom soon and that he would fill her in. Let me tell you my Dad was basically starving to death as he could only eat this pudding crap from the strokes. Lynn made me and my brother go get beer, rum, coke vodka and everything else as he was drooling that shitty pudding. My sister was freaking and Lynn stone faced looked at her and said. What are they going to throw him out, Well after that we hung as a family in courtyard all day. Lynn the fed my Dad the fave of his life. RUM and Coke and he never dribbled a drop, LOL.

He died two days later. The last pic I have of me dad is him giving me the finger. It was a joke between us, I knew then that My love was accepted from by my family. You see I had already decided she was the one and that no matter what I would be with her. I grew up with many rules but number one was respect all women. My parents were both succesful in the life in everything. My Mom graduated university and worked for a large Corperation. So being the youngest I was spoiled. In the end my Dad felt that finally I was grounded in the sense of life and he knew then that I would continue his morals. I am too this day forever grateful that I also have Lynn's kids to carry the torch and rules of my father as I got to teach them the things my father taught me.

Anyway my post is not about this actually but to say thank you to all the people at Steemit that I will forever be grateful and I hope in my next life I can watch over you all but only until my love joins me because then again I will need to fly with her and the ravens and discover things in the next realm. I do believe life moves on just without the broken body.

Here we go and if I forget some one I apologize now.

@lynncoyle1 - No words needed here my Babylooo. You are my reason for life, you are my love, my heart, my soul. You are the wind the rain the moon and sun.......You burn in my heart eternally

@davemccoy- A man with a heart and the love that many here see and share I am sure. He is the one to go to bat for all of you here no matter the consequences. no matter the cost. He is a friend that all us should be priveledged to have. I am glad to say he is one of my best friends in this life and I know he will be in the next.

@thedarkhorse- Another friend here to us all. A man whom believes in the pay it forward rules of life. Who measures life in my eyes by respect. morals and honesty. I will forever remember him as a friend I could call in a pinch. Now we have never met in person and I wish I would or could have. I would tell his kids that there Dad is an amazing friend to many and that they should always remember that.

@themanwithnoname- He is a gentleman in every aspect of the word. A true friend who even while on holidays shared his auto upvote. He is like his name. A mystery man with a heart of gold and a friend whom we all should be lucky to meet in our life.

@simplymike- A Belgiam girl from across the world whom actually has respect and love to spare and checks in regularly even though she is in a tough situation at the moment. I will forever be happy to say that she is an amazing friend

@donkeypong- A man of few words as I call him. he shows up to help in a way that we should all be thankful. He up votes you without asking for fanfare or anything in return and yes being a whale here as you all say shows that Tom is a true gentleman in every sense of the word. I might add @analisa ansd @kevinwong as they seem to be a team LOL

@edprivat- Here is a man and great musician who not only dedicated music to our situation but also has done requests from myself and Lynn to each other when in reality he already has enough to do I am sure. If I was healthy I would fly to South africa to shake his hand, hug him and say I respect you more that I could ever show.

@jbreheny- A man who is now travelling the States yet still takes the time to say hello and check in. A man I am glad to say you are my friend and I thank you for being here for me. I will never forget

@apolymask- He was one of my firest people I met here and even though I am not in his league when it comes to Steemit he has ben a good friend and answers any question I have ever asked. I know I am probably interupting him as his contest grows and grows yet he never makes me feel like a burden, ever.

@galenkp- well he makes me laugh, been there for my girl and tells me that they made a movie about me. Monty Python's life of Brian. To this day he has motivated me to write about my good times too and I am thankful for his motivational chats lol. Even though he did call me a idiot once, in a joking manner. BTW I too put ketchup on almost everything. Thanks for being a good friend here to both of us and I am asking that you continue to for Lynn when I am gone. Thats a test ok

@abh12345- What can I say, you are a big boy here and I am a minnow but you have always treted me with respect and honestly that means more to me than you can imagine. Thanks for all the help with my questions too. Thanks for being my friend.

@tryskele- The girl from bum fuck no where colorado. Who has a festival for a chicken that lost his head. I truly love you like a sister and some day I will hug you tight in this life or the next life

@glenalbrethsen- you might friend and Lynn type the damnest longest comments ever but I am glad. Got to find out some interesting things. Please continue to chat with my girl and your job is to keep her motivated in Ashers league. Thanks for being a friend. in my heart foreve

@wolfhart- we are two peas in the same pod. All I can say is live, love and laugh my friend.

@angelacs- You my new friend are an inspiration to me and I will remember that always

@johndoer123- Thank you my friend for having a kind soul and a great heart. Thank you always

@beeyou- I have no words other than to say I am always and forever grateful for meeting you. You have the heart of a angel and much love to share. Keep it up

@yogajill- many thanks for motivating me and helpingme through tough times. Many hugs

@grolelo- well another donkeypong type. very amazing and thank you. A man of few words but a friend that is there no matter what

@insideoutlet and #shai-hulud- Another girl that has followed my story and supported and motivated me. much love to you both.

@johnjgeddes and @countrygirl- two amazing people with amazing talent that got me through many a tough day. Thank you from my heart

@hitmeasap -who in his own way has come to help my love and I ask that you continue to do so. I am forever grateful for the way you do ythoings without asking anything in return. You sir have my upmost respect

@willymac - your words and support I can repeat off my tongue because you have a way with words sir and I thank you

@plushzilla- well here is a friend beyond friends. All I can say, he knows what I mean

@terminallyill - not much to say but love you brother

@bashadow- Thank you my friend for just that. your friendship and support. you are a good man

@charisma777- Even when you had tough times you still showed love and support. Thank you

@grace44 - words not needed. love you girl

Now there are more that I know I am skipping so here the list of whom has my respect beyond my words
@jayclair30
@robertandrew
@anonymity5
@happycrazycon
@wanderlass - where are you
@itiscalebjames
@elsiekjay
@wdougwatson
@paulag
@smylie2005
@tarazkp
@barski
@youhavewings
@markwhittam
@goldendawne
@lymepoet
@magicalmoonlight
@sparkesy

I know I am missing many and I am sorry if I did. My mind is a hard thing at times lol. Anyway I will start to power down and slowly fade away my friends. I need rest and hinestly the strength is hard to find most days. I will be here a few months I hope but please in my heart I love you all, truly. I ask you to remember in a previous post to be there for Lynn and help her. I know as friends you will and sorry for asking again but it makes me feel better.

My Dad

my Family

My Love

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What a beautiful post baby! Thank you for your words to me, and to everyone else here as well. So awesome ;) xo

fancy seeing you here!! beer cheers my girl, happy friday! xx

Okay, so I was sent here by @terminallyill and here I see all of my peeps from abh123's curation and engagement list! So now I feel more comfortable giving you a 100% upvote because TI and I are in #thealliance playground together as "kids." Go figure! Anyhoo, my beer cheers girl (your BabyLoo) has become one of my favs as well as many many on your list. I'm actually surprised I have not run into you. All this said, I wish you much love & peace on your journey. Yours, Eagle

Hey there, Thank you. sorry responding late. pain unbearablelast few days. My girl talks about you alot....Thank you

@briancourteau i am very sad to hear of your pain. have you heard of energy work? i wanted to ask you but was a little hesitant. someone almost paid for a medicine card/energy work for you and lynn but we weren't sure if you two would be accepting. i do long distance and i help many people in your situation. let me know and i am sending blessings to you. ps. it will ease some of your discomfort and pain. xx

so nice. what does it entail as my sleep is screwed up and some days cannot get out of bed

@briancourteau you would not need to get out of bed, if you want you and lynn can both be in there and we can meet on discord and talk about it. i'm thankful that you commented back and i am thinking of you two every day. blessings.

@briancourteau, stay strong my brother, please. I love you man, you are a strong and good hearted person, as well as one of the handful of people on here I can consider a true friend and brother! I talked to my partner and we should be able to get launch going ASAP. I am sorry it has not been sooner, I honestly feel terrible over it. Never doubt the most important thing, that we are your family and will do anything that we can for you! We are here for you brother!

Try using the #goodkarma tag when you post also, to draw some attention from some of the benefactors on there that we will be utilizing. As always my friend, stay in charge of this shit and give it Hell. The world needs you here, you cannot go anywhere man. I need you and the community needs you here bro. Keep fighting!

This was an absolutely amazing post by the way, thank you for sharing this with all of us! I always look forward to reading and connecting to your work. Please, continue to share with us all. We love you man, from our hearts, you are family to us, @greetersguild, in this life and in any other. Continue to put up the good fight, you inspire so many of us in ways you do not know!

Thank you so much. too much pain to really respond properly but everything you typed I feel the same about you

Lynn and I have been back and forthing for a few months now, but your last post was the first where I really talked to you, and I'm glad I did. It's amazing how paths can cross, even if they're actually years or miles apart. Life's got a way of connecting us all if we'll let it.

I really don't think Lynn needs a lot of motivation for Asher's Leagues. Kind of think of it, she was doing better before I came along. :)

However, I'm not planning to change what I do for as long as I can help it, so inevitably Lynn and I will continue to cross paths, too. We don't ever seem to be more than a comment or two away.

whoa! i tell you most of the people on this list seem to be on the abh's weekly curation/engagement. Also, i'm in groups with most of them. great taste! :)

Truth to tell, I'm surprised to be on one for him. I'm happy to be by association, though, via Lynn. And it's true, the leaguers are big on the list. I'm glad. This is a part of what the league is capable of being, not only a potential means to keep Steemit honest, but a support and safety network when needed. I'm happy to be a part of it, even if I'm kind of the partypooper because I'm not in multiple groups. :)

why? you are friends with Lynn and it makes sense.
no worries, some people are just not into groups. i try to grab many of my boo boos (friends) but they refuse. oh well. happy friday!

I'm here :) You have a wonderful family and parents who loved you and raised you well. I am sure your mom is very happy when you met Lynn.

A lot of people love you and Lynn. We will be here for Lynn. It's sad but I totally understand that you need to rest. I wish you well in your health, I still believe in healing.

thanks so much friend. Your comments hit close to my heart. Thank you

@briancourteau thank you for your kind words. You and @lynncoyle1 are a couple of the people who I've met here on steemit that I really hope to meet one day.

I am sorry I never met you years ago my friend. I wou;d have been drinking Sangria with you

I am sorry i fprgot to add yopu as the se lynn grin is a bog deal in helping me laugh. plwase forgive me.

There's nothing to forgive, @briancourteau! You and @lynncoyle1 have already thanked me a bazillion times for my little bits of silliness, so please don't give it another thought. Sending loads of love, hugs, and other good juju to you both. ❤️❤️

We've got your back mate. We'll make sure @lynncoyle1 is looked after

I love the story about your parents and your's and Lynn's. I mentioned to Lynn when I met my current husband, it was the same thing. We just knew over the time in our relationship we've only been separated a short time and we feel empty when the other's not there. I wish people could understand this kind of love. And I feel the same way, I have come to love as a brother (you actually talk to me so I guess more than a brother LOL)

I'm glad that my crazy random thoughts have made you smile. One day at a time...We will see Mike the Headless chicken together!!

I can feel you and your well wished within the post articles. Take good care of yourself.
I say that again, think positive about yourself.
Best wishes

I am sorry I forgot youir name on my list. I truly am.

Not an issue bro. Most important is you get well soon. The rest is secondary.
Cheers