My farewell to my Tres Marias nieces which returned to their Grandmother's home for the school season

in #life5 months ago (edited)

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My nieces already went away to stay to where they are more comfortable in living into and I regret that it happened maybe because they perceive that their own house here is not their home. But where they stay now is a place nearer to the school where they will study for rest of this school year.

I feel a bit of lonely now because my three nieces will again get back to live in their other grandmother's house because their school is nearer there. They have no trouble living with their grandmother together with their other three cousins with their parents because it was the place where they had grown-up. I guess that my nieces preferred to live in there because they have also three cousins which I guess that is more like sisters to them. If I were also to choose that kind of situation then I also think that it is a very good idea being close to your cousins in that way because you will inadvertently get more emotional bonding to your cousins which in turn give you more advantages in life like when you needed any kind of support or things like that, then you will not have any problems from getting it when you needed it. But in cases that when you had all grown-up and get to live with your new family or even get to work abroad, it will be a factor about getting support from them and from your own support for them. I am just talking about emotional and physical support here because I do hate bothering people about financial support as I find it really to be disturbing to the other party and no one really wants to get affected by your own misfortune in life as people tends to avoid you if it happens although you are not asking them any support whatsoever because I am just saying this out from my experiences. That experience had reminded me how to really not rely on others especially if your case needs to be sustained in a long-term manner because people will just try to avoid you like a plague like what happened a long time ago when some group in my church from the district level where I was requesting to have this medicine or I think it was a calcium supplement or so. Then it so happened that the one whom I was contacting with had actually changed her SIM card of her phone, a typical technique when a person does not want to text or talk to you anymore otherwise they will contact you if they did changed the SIM card of their phones after or beforehand. That same group from our church's district charity group or at least that person whom I was in contact with never even bothered to say "Hi, Hello" to me again after that which just means that she does not want to do anything to do to me ever again. I already knew that she really did the SIM card change just to avoid me and after that I just avoided her too because I really felt that I was low of the low and is enough that I realized that I was "avoided like a plague" due to the nature of my situation where I was so desperate to reach-out for help as being a dialysis patient with no income source, paying our of pocket with only loans given by loan sharks and later getting a loan from my brother's co-workers free of interests thanks to God and that supportive brother of mine, and then having no insurance to fall back on or to use to ease-up the burden of paying for my "every five days" of dialysis schedule really is enough for me to realize and then think that I have to find some ways to never ever seek the help from other people personally anymore.

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I belong to a family-oriented country and it is important for us to do so because for one things it was the value that we are brought-up with plus the fact that we get to support each other where family help will come first and the only thing that we can truly rely on in times of need. In my opinion it is better to build emotional bonding with our relatives too because for one thing it makes us happier and that we can also get support easy from them based on our own family tree and individual values.

That instance when I was still a new dialysis patient, I was just penniless and helpless to do anything about had kept me so frustrated and made me feel to pity myself all the time within those initial years where I was subjected into a fight which I found to be too overwhelming to carry on my shoulders which I just keep on not thinking about it because otherwise I will just go into depression or I might kill myself because in truth I do not want to live like that because it is obviously heavy heavy to sustain with not much anyone helping except when I go myself and go to request from our local politicians to seek help where the themselves also cannot do anything much because I am not the only one seeking financial assistance but also other people with their own reasons and cases as well which I am only getting this amount not enough to pay for a whole dialysis treatment session. It is only that my other loving brother can support me financially during that period of time with only little salary that he was earning and the loans that he and my mother was doing while my parents themselves can only help much too because they also are helpless for supporting my medical troubles financially because my father himself cannot work abroad anymore because of his age and his profession also is not enough too if he did able to find employment from abroad because he is a heavy equipment mechanic and he can only get as little as $350 dollars from it maximum. At that same time period, both of my other siblings are still in school where my eldest brother went to study in college that time around to pursue another career again because he felt that his technical vocation which is about welding and running a lathe machine cannot really make him money and provide for him and maybe his potential family when the time comes. And so he chose to get a degree again for being a high school teacher which probably assed that it will be the career for him to make his future better than being an employee which an employer can just ditch you just like that especially because of the factor that such career is only a low-paying job here in my country. The same career path is being done by my sister but unlike my brother, she was just forced to get her degree in being a teacher herself because our family cannot sustain what she really wanted to study for which is being a medical technologist or therapist if I can remember it correctly or something being in the field of medical professional. My mother told her at that time that if she would pursue to get her career, we will not be able to eat. so my sister cannot do anything because she cannot work to sustain her career for the reason that she is just a newly graduated student from high school and seeking for a job also never had come to her mind too which is why she just picked-up anything at that time than waste her time just being at home. After graduating she didn't pursue her career so she preferred to work abroad as an employee for a department store in Dubai and earning that much only and after sometime she went to get a job as an employee, also with les than a minimum wage and then being a wife for sometime which made her to rely on her husband for money. Many years later that my younger sister was able to use her degree as a high school teacher after some convincing and support from her sister-in-law, her husband's sister and together with my own sister-in-law from my eldest brother which are now both principals from their school. They told her to get started in teaching because she can have money on her own and that she will have her own money and not be reliant to what her husband will give her and I am glad that she did after many years of being a housewife and a mother to my three nieces. Now my own sister is now waiting to level-up as a teacher-3 or something like that and that is an awesome thing about teachers here in my country because achieving such levels of I guess "seniority" or experience for their career also upgrades the level of salary with a chance to reach the level of being a principal with also its level of being a school or collage principal as I have learned.

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Unlike other countries, the support will always comes from our own immediate family members and would persist based on the capacity of the individual members of the family but you will still be lucky if they would do it out of their love for you and not just being forced to do which the latter seldom happens too.

Now my sister is earning her own money with a great chance of earning bigger and bigger salary in due time. So she promised that as soon as her monthly payment for the car that she bought a few years ago which actually slashed her income in half, she will give more financial support to my parents especially if she achieves another level of teacher status and it corresponding pay grade. My other brother was the one that sacrificed for my situation and I thank God that both of us are also a member of our own religion because that factor alone was the thing that lead for my survival during the initial years of my being a dialysis patient because our own church, mcgi.org, teaches to help people especially their own family members which lead to my own benefit considering that many years before joining our church, that brother of mine really is that not close to me compared after he also joined our church about a year and few days of my membership to mcgi.org. If not for that he could very well like my eldest brother which can only help much, I mean he can just look at me and not do anything which I happen to a have a feeling of resentment although my family really have no obligation to help me out and it is just that we have no extra financial capacity for sustaining my very difficult financial obligation at that time where I cannot also possibly help myself because my body is too weak and toxic to move normally to do anything physically because I was just going for dialysis every five days which is way not enough to make me feel normal or totally eased-up any only just enjoyed a three times weekly treatment session due to my government's people-friendly insurance system, our universal healthcare system which now solved most of my financial obligation for getting my own dialysis treatments and I thank God a millions times for that.

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It is so important for us to be able to help ourselves in times of great need because we are not sure or it will be improbable for other people to support us when it happens where the outside support should be just a bonus born out of love and care from people who happened to be emotionally connected to you during your early lives. So it also pays to develop closeness to other people particularly with our relatives because it does make us happy in the first place just like my nieces who happen to develop strong family ties with their cousins from their grandmother's house where their cousins are now just like their own sisters to them and that factor benefits them greatly even though they have no more other cousins around.


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