My treatment session yesterday got delayed because of a burnt electric wire coming from the on-grid solar energy system of our clinic
I felt pity for my parents for having to put up with my life's "disgrace" because of the delay on my dialysis treatment because as we were told by some of the co-patients of mine and the nurses, a wore coming from the solar energy set-up had burned-up so the hospital has to call the electricity company's branch to fix it anew. The hospital didn't suffer an electric cut but the dialysis clinic beside it did. So I was notified by the nurse in charge of scheduling the patients that the first set (the first batch of patients which will get treated this day) weren't hooked-up yet and we just have to wait for another text message coming from that nurse on what time we can get hooked-up (the second set). By the time that the first set had gotten hooked-up it was already past noon because the electricity company didn't showed up swiftly enough so the first had to wait from before 5:30 a.m. until around to the finish of their own dialysis treatments at 4:30 in the afternoon. I myself got hooked-up for dialysis a few minutes before five 'o clock in the afternoon so by the time that we arrived home it is already near ten 'o clock in the evening. I said that I felt pity for my parents because they are already old, my father has a difficult time in driving at night and it gets dangerous for us and then it is already passed the sleeping hours of my mother as well and that is no good for them because they are not as old as their younger old years for the reason that my mother is already feeling lots of aches and pains in her body while my father is also not doing pretty well with his cognitive performance in that regard.
Actually I already am feeling the embarrassment of having to drag my parents with this burden of having to go three times a week just for me to clean my blood regularly and it takes time, effort, money, and sacrifice to do it because it will just mean my life and because of it my parents have to sacrifice of what is left to their time which should just be spent in other ways which I hope to be more on getting closer to God. I pray that God himself would reconsider not only me and my parents because we are still weak in faith but I myself is trying although I still stumble and fall and might also die in trying. Nothing can be much more important to a handicapped son like me in this world than to enjoy the love and support of my parents because it is a fact that nobody can sacrifice for me like what my parents are doing along with the care of my siblings because I find other people no matter how caring and loving they will be will not replace my parents and then my siblings. The value that I get from my parents is so great particularly now that I had spent most of my living existence being with them all the time especially now that I am a handicap and couldn't do much physical things on my own, I still am dependent on my mother alone for me to do things and the fact that my father cannot do the same is what also bothers me too especially if it is a thing which he is not doing before or if it will break the routine on what he is doing as even telling him to get an item from my bag gives him a hard time for example or if I told him to do this all of the sudden then he will say later or tell me "why didn't you said it before" which is a prompt for me to cancel it. But regardless, my father too is what completes our family despite that there is some level of estrangement between us his children and him because of his being away working abroad while we are growing-up plus the fact that there is no modern way of communication between us his children and him while the telephoning from those years is not available in our home because we can only do it in the city which ta that time is a spectacle to do because of the cost of calling with a wired telephone costs big and it is a big deal to call a person too from those years. Anyway, having to have my parents with me all the time gives me a sense of guilt because of the trouble that I am giving them whereas my father, being overly shy is also embarrassed himself being exposed to people especially with me around. Our hands are tied in this situation but what we can do, we are a victim of our own circumstances. There is nothing much that I can do really now but to hope that I can pay them with a token of appreciation like I was always saying to give lots o f easement which they deserved and I hope that it will come if not this year then to the next and ultimately maybe of it is the will of the Lord God that I will still exist five years in the future to give my parents the best thing that they can have.
My mother by the way always wants to go with me and my father whenever it is my dialysis treatment schedule because as she told me that she gets bored in the house with nothing to talk with and she knows that it is not good because she needs to interact with people so that her brain will not sort of get stagnant. So going with me to the dialysis will give her more time to talk or interact with the family members or guardians of the other patients which gives her some form of entertainment and they form their own community there at the small hut or rest-house made of out of bamboo and nipa at the back of the dialysis clinic at the edge of the parking area overlooking the marshland which our town was once is made out of until the population grew and settled within and if you can observe, most of the residential houses or properties are in the roadside while at the back are just plain marshland which some people also bought and turned to either rice fields, fish farm, or crab farms if not reclaimed as a residential area or business area. So it is not that bad being with other people when it comes to going for my dialysis session because at least my mother can chat with or eat with her friends where sometimes they go when their patients would pass-away because it is just a normal occurrence at dialysis.
Anyhow my treatment session finally came to an end and we got back to our home safe and sound thanks be to God. With such setback it cannot really be avoided because it is a system especially with a solar set-up down by the owner of the hospital so that he can save a lot of money for paying to the consumption of power by the dialysis clinic where the consumption of the sole air-conditioner used at the dialysis clinic is already costing the owner of about PhPesos 20,000 or maybe more because it is already old and overworked aside from the individual consumption of eight dialysis machines which also are power hog because those machines have heaters and motors inside them and would operate for at least more than sixteen hours per day depending on the numbers of patients for the reason that the number of patients fluctuates because of the mortality rate or other patients are high because of the health complications that they have already existing aside from having a failed set of Kidneys.
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