Wash Your Hand Before Pointing ☝️
"Who are you to judge the life I live? I know I'm not perfect-and I don't live to be-but before you start pointing fingers...
make sure you hands are clean!"
- Bob Marley
I really love this quote and I find a deep message in this metaphor, because before we point it's better we first take a look at ourselves in the mirror.
Pointing is a habit I think we all have. It's like a natural instinct. When we are overwhelmed with a sensation or problem we point at someone or something to direct this problem away from us.
An interesting thing about pointing is that the main attention is on the pointing finger as seen in the picture below. It is a powerful universal gesture that immediately put us in a defensive mode.
We all know that being pointed at is not a nice feeling and also having something pointed out to us might no be something we like to agree with.
My dad taught me something very interesting regarding this phenomenon. When we point the main focus is on the pointing finger leading away from us. But as a matter of fact when we point one finger at someone else we simultaneously have three fingers pointed back at ourselves.
I have always been a bit anxious when it comes to being organized. I always seem to be playing hide and seek with my keys. As soon as the situation appears when I can't find something I often start pointing at my wife. It is kind of embarrassing though when I often end up finding what I look for under my sofa cushion or in my bag or god knows where. Lately though I try to recall the lesson my dad taught me and I analyze my emotions. I realize that I get anxious because I should know where I put my things and that I take it out on my wife. By realizing where the emotion arises from I realize it's my own problem and that I can solve it with an inner dialogue and carefully look for my things till I find them before starting to point the finger.
I had another situation recently where I was blaming without analyzing myself first. It was just recently that I told my wife that Steemit is so quiet and slow these days. However, it didn't take long before I started to reflect the problem and realize that I have not been spending much time curating recently. Lately things have been very busy at work so that has lead to less energy on commenting and upvoting. So Steemit hasn't really changed its me that has changed and I need to step up my game.
I find self reflection is one of the most important tools for self improvement. We don't get anywhere by blaming others. Also by blaming others instead of dealing with our own problems we can create enemies and even more problems.
Because as the saying goes; " what goes around comes around" so it's better to think twice and instead of spreading blame we can spread sympathy and understanding, don't you agree?
I completely agree with you. It's easy to point the finger, and not first look at ourselves and like you mentioned, self reflect. Blaming the poor wife for your own misplaced keys lol Sounds familiar!
Hahaha I guess a lot of people can relate to that one lol tip! 0.1
Yep :) Thanks for the tip! btw, don't worry at all about sending me a tip as you power up :)
Thank you for your understanding. I need to control my voting finger lol
lol so many fingers to control😜
Haha yea that is a problem
:)
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@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)Simply - amazing story. Look your hand - my friend.
Thanks a lot Dobartim :) I surely appreciate it ! tip! 0.1
Hi @dobartim! @dandesign86 is sending you 0.1 SBD tip and @tipU upvote :)
@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)I agree to Bob Marley! Thanks for the post. Have a nice day.
Thank you :)
Self-reflection is indeed very important to improve. Very interesting post!
Thanks a lot :) self reflection indeed can be a useful tool and I think it's especially important for designers like us as we have to try to understand the mindset of others as well in order to find solutions that works for everyone. tip! 0.2
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@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)hehehe, nice picture! I guess it is a man thing, blaming the wife for missing they own stuff. My husband also likes to do that.
Haha it's a universal problem it seems ! I remember my friend had this thing on his keychain where if you whistled it would beep and then you could find it I would like to get one of those hehe tip! 0.1
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@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)Good one.
Thank you Oldtimer! tip! 0.3
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@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)I certainly do agree with you, just the simple act of realizing what really happens within us and others when we point fingers could bring lots of positivity. What makes it even better is that, like you said, the physical act is more telling than anything, I had never even thought about the 3 fingers pointing back so thanks for pointing it out.
Also, I definitely relate to thinking something has gone quiet when it's me that has neglected it. This is so true for many things besides steemit including relationships and so forth. Indeed, mindfulness and self reflection are extremely important yet so easy to stray away from.
Very awesome reply and we are on the same page here, you definitely got the message of the story :) tip! 0.2
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@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)Jesus said it like this Luke 6:41-42 "41 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but perceivest not the beam that is in thine own eye? 42 Either how canst thou say to thy brother, Brother, let me pull out the mote that is in thine eye, when thou thyself beholdest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of thine own eye, and then shalt thou see clearly to pull out the mote that is in thy brother's eye."
This is an important thought for us to remember, but it can be hard when we try to put it into practice. It is a natural reaction to point out the mistakes, foolish moves or silly errors of others because it tends to make us feel good about ourselves, and makes us feel superior in some way. I can tell you the truth though, I have done a lot of foolish and silly things in my life, and I make all kinds of mistakes every day. Fortunately most of them go unseen by others, but they certainly are reminders for me to give people a little more understanding because we are all human.
Very nice thoughtful answer and I like the quote ! tip! 0.2
Hi @deaconlee! @dandesign86 is sending you 0.2 SBD tip and @tipU upvote :)
@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)" You have not lived my life. How can you feel what I feel. How can you understand my actions" . What you write is so true. Passing verdicts is the mark of an immature mind that has not really experienced life. My mother used to say that the world blames only those who have the guts to take initiatives. Only babies are blameless :D . Instead of pointing fingers, understanding leads to solutions and agreement or disagreement thereafter :) . Nice post @dandesign86 .
Thanks for your awesome comment and your mums statement is very wise ! tip! 0.1
Thank you @dandesign86 for the tip and for the support and appreciation. I am happy that my words resonate with your thoughts. And your father's observation is accurate and wise too :)
You are welcome:) Sometimes I find my father to be quiet wise :)!Thanks
Parents have lived life a little more than us. And we have seen more chaos and turbulence than them in fewer years. Hence it is a good idea to consider their words and our experience together, in unison. :) .... It helps :) ....
You are welcome @dandesign86 :)
You are right, you can learn a lot from the Internet, but real life experiences told in person I think can be the most useful
True :) ... What we gather from other people's experience is KNOWLEDGE. What we gather from internet is INFORMATION. What we gather from our own experience is AWARENESS . When the three are juxtaposed, and flavoured with COMPASSION, it becomes WISDOM OF LIFE :) .... Good day to you you @dandesign86
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@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)Wow that is a very intelligent answer and I like it tip! 0.1
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@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)Thank you @dandesign86 and @tipu . It is very gracious of you :) .
Many times when I give advice to people, they interpret it as if I'm pointing fingers at them for doing bad things.
I think a lot of people are so far removed from reality that if you tell them something that works for you, that they feel like you're belittling them.
It's a weird phenomenon to observe.
You do have a point. I don't necessarily think that people are far removed from reality though I just think we have to realize sometimes that everyone's reality can be completely different.
I find that that I am quite open to criticism or advice, we have to realize that we are all far from perfect :) thanks for your comment tip! 0.1 I appreciate when people speak their mind
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