Stop Trying to Impress People *TRY THIS*
I have spent a considerable amount of my life trying to win over the approval of others. I felt deep satisfaction as a child if I was praised for doing something right. As a young musician on stage growing up I got way too much approval for my own good. It made me entitled to the approval of others. I barely needed to try to impress people, all I had to do was play the drums and people would praise me for it.
So you can guess my ego was massive growing up, and this area of my life was the hardest to let go of. I have finally let go of trying to impress others. I’m done! You have no idea how liberating this is. You may not realize how hard you try to win over the approval and love of others. It is something hidden so deep in your subconscious. Your ego has done a fine job of convincing you to be somebody you are not just for some praise.
Get ready to fly! I’m not even kidding you will feel so liberated, you’ll realize how much time there is in a day to do what you want to do! Not what makes you look good, but what truly fulfills you!
We see it in child stars and spoiled brats all the time. They receive way too much praise, approval and love that they lose their minds! They feel entitled, they grow up and realize the approval of others, is out of their control. I will repeat that: the approval of others is out of your control! You cannot and will never please everyone. Imagine a field with 5 thousand campfires. This is a weird analogy but just go with it. Your job is to keep all 5 thousand fires lit. Unless you had some industrial flame thrower, you would be stressed out of your mind running around this field tirelessly stoking each fire.
Trying to impress people and win over their love is a constant treadmill. They can instantly decide they hate you out of nowhere, then what? They can even convince others to hate you, rumors can spread, you can mess up big time. This sounds extremely pessimistic but its true. I’m going to attempt to guide you to a point where you do exactly what I did and say boldly and loudly “FUCK IT!” It is the most empowering statement I’ve uttered in my entire life. Here’s 5 ways you can give up this need and put this part of your ego at rest once and for all.
1 — REALIZE WHO YOU REALLY ARE
You are not your appearance, let alone your achievements, talents or anything else you receive praise for. You are nothing but a loving awareness, a spirit deep down that is being overwhelmed by your ego. Once you begin to realize you are so much more than the promotion you just got or any possible promotion or material object you could ever own, you feel a deep sense of self love. You’ll think “wow, nobody actually knows who I really am.” You will begin opening up to others, most importantly, you will start opening up to yourself. You will start following your heart, which leads us into the next step.
2 — REALIZE WHAT REALLY MATTERS
At the end of the day, you and everyone’s opinions about you won’t be around in 100 years. Whether they love you or not, the sun will still eventually explode and the heat death of the universe is inevitable. Now this isn’t pessimistic, it’s just a real understanding of the fact that the approval or disapproval of others does not matter. It doesn’t change who you are, you will still be you.
3 — REALIZE IT IS OUT OF YOUR CONTROL
In this life one of the only things you have control over is your thoughts, and your feelings. They will think whatever they want to think regardless of your wanting otherwise. Whether you like it or not, people will hate you. But people will also love you if you just be yourself. My close friendships have become so real because I am being my true self. Many will accept you, many will hate you. You have a clear choice to focus on your lovers or your haters. Which will you choose?
4 — REALIZE IT IS A CHEAP EGO HIGH
The only thing you’re chasing is a high that ego gives you. A sense of lame confidence and pride for a moment. The biggest issue here is that the ego always wants more. It is never satisfied. Giving up and being yourself regardless of what others might think is like stepping off this ego treadmill you’ve been on for probably years. Step off the treadmill and you will receive true, long term joy and happiness. A feeling of peace that very much outweighs the ego high.
5 — REALIZE EVERYONE IS THE SAME
Everyone is just as nervous as you are, they’re seeking approval just as much as you are. Its similar to when you have to present a school project in front of the entire class. Nearly every student is extremely nervous when they go up to present. If they only knew that they all felt the same. That no one likes presenting, that they all get nervous, you wouldn’t be so nervous. Once you realize who you really are, you also realize everyone else is that same thing. A loving awareness in a human body, disguised by the ego. Everyone has a purpose, a passion. Everyone has so much love inside of them. Realize that anyone’s ego judgments or hatred is just that, a fabrication of their ego. It’s not them,nor is it coming from a real place. True love comes from a real place. All negativity directed at someone else stems from the ego.
Jim Carrey calls depression “keeping up an image in the world” and for some, that is exactly what depression is. It’s a constant battle to keep up this image when in reality, we fuck up! A lot! After all in this world, we’re human. So just stop living your life for temporary approval and go live your purpose! Go send love to your closest friends and family members! Go contribute to the world! Give your all! Now that you’re free from this never ending treadmill of the ego, you’re ready to play with life! Have fun!
Cameron Dube, HUMBOWL
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