WHY! OH, WHY! Can I not fit my whole hand in a Pringles can!

Love
Remember folks, love can be complicated and 50 Shades Freed isn't as bad of a movie as its made out to be. I mean, if I can enjoy listening to "I Want It That Way" from the Backstreet Boys, why can't I enjoy this movie? I mean, its got some excitement, some nice cars and well, CARS!

Cars
Come on, 610hp and a top speed of 210? I think my Dodge Dart got wet thinking about being parked next to an Audi R8. I mean, come on...what better car is there to speed through the Cascade Range and the streets of Bellevue in the same day? Whoa, Bellevue sounds a bit like Bella.

Bella
Bella Thorne or Bella Hadid? One has a bit of acting chops and the other can look super hot wearing a microwave...not sure of her other skills, though...YOU DECIDE!

Deciding
Thats what Christian Grey did in the movie. Family man it is! Lets just hope that he doesn't let that crazy lady he grew up with babysit...that would be dumb as hell. Speaking of Dumb as Hell...

Pringle Can
Have you ever heard the Bo Burnham's song "Can't Handle This (Kanye Rant)"? It is like the pinnacle of comedy songs...damn...

Steemit
Maybe Steemit can get Bo Burnham on here? He could liven the place up a bit, right?

/Rant (or whatever that was)