"Remember when you wanted what you currently have!"

I hate that we’re in a world where all wise aphorisms are on Instagram accompanied by a photo of a Suicide Girl Hopeful twerking, but…here we are. There’s a meme making it’s rounds, though, that has resonated with me lately. “Remember when you wanted what you currently have.” That powerful statement paired with a stock photo of a chick doing yoga on a Santa Monica cliffside. It’s cheesy, yeah, but it’s one of the few that’s snuck through my social media meme filter and triggered my synapses to fire […if you’re curious, “Finished, not perfect.” is the other one].

Last night, before going to sleep, @vermillionfox rolled over to a (67) reputation. She’d be on the bleeding edge of that for few days. When I woke up this morning, I noticed that I’d hit a (71) rep. Far from the higher echelon of some of my Steemit friends, sure. @gringalicious, @timcliff, @acidyo, @papa-pepper, @opheliafu, @slowwalker, @exyle and others are what I consider aspirational-level Steemians. I don’t get too wrapped up with follower count or reputation […for myself at least], but to know the commitment and work it’s taken me to get to (71), it is encouraging to have friends that I can aspire to reach those levels of Steemit success.

The same day I hit this new Steemit milestone, I rolled over to 31K followers on Instagram. I should talk to @tarotbyfergus about a fall reading and why these are happening in sync. The thing about the Instagram milestone; I really don’t care. There was a time when becoming Insta-famous […or anything close to it] was all I wanted. I still see friends, both photographers and models trying SO hard to achieve it. I have other friends that legitimately are at that level, with over 200K followers, and they’re slaves to it! I’m telling you, whole-heartedly, reaching a (71) on Steemit means far more than 31K followers on Instagram.

My career is stable, relatively consistent […as far as freelance art goes], but even in my personal life, I have the things I once longed for. I moved to Minneapolis in 2010. Prior to that, I lived in Scranton, PA. A small, sad city so culturally and economically depressed it was the best choice to base a show about a failing paper company […I love The Office but there were obvious reasons they chose Scranton as the location for Dunder Mifflin, and they weren’t wrong]. Moving to Minneapolis was something I wanted to do for years and I’ve never felt more at home.

My son was born in 2011 and a short time later, I almost lost him. I was a new father out of marriage and I experienced the sobering reality that I may not have any relationship with him at all. I spent Christmas Eve sleeping on a half inflated air mattress at a friend’s who was in Chicago for the weekend. His thermostat broke and the empty room was in the low 50º’s. My future was uncertain, I had $2.80 to my name […and that isn’t an exaggeration] and I have clear [slightly traumatic] memories of eating a Lean Cuisine as I watched my breath before my eyes. I'll never eat one of those fucking things again.

If I had a rock bottom, I think that was it. I wanted a career that could sustain myself, my son and our home. I wanted my son and the chance to raise him. I wanted to love and be loved by someone that really felt like a partner, who supported me. Even now, I can think back to that sad air mattress and recall what I wanted. I made it through that hard time, and today, I have all of those things. I was awarded custody of my son before the end of that year. My career has blossomed far beyond my realistic expectations of what it could be, and @vermillionfox is the best partner I could ever ask for.

One of my personality flaws is that I disproportionally focus  on the things I want. “I want to make a living as a comic book artist!”, “I want this market to recover so I can finally stop traveling and shooting!”, and that’s true. Those are things I want. For tonight, though, I thought it’d be fair to spend time appreciating the things I do have. I have a lot, and I’m grateful for all of it. Thanks for reading, supporting, resteeming and voting all the way to my shiny new (71). For more photography, art, illustration and thoughts about life and Steemit, follow me here @kommienezuspadt!