How long are children allowed to be kids? Life is the biggest lesson!
Can we stop the time?
After reading @kafkanarchy84's post today I was wondering about how fast do we want our kids to grow up. And while writing this article my mind shifted and I started thinking for how long kids can be just kids and discover everything with their own eyes at their time.
Sure we cheer every little step and move, the first turn-over excites us like crazy and watching our little ones walking their first steps all by themselves is a feeling I would love to treasure for the rest of my life. It makes us proud seeing them doing things little by little, more and more refusing to get our help.
But on the other hand all that is telling us that time will never stand still and there won't be any way back, they little ones will become bigger and more independent day by day. Of course that is great, that is one of the miracles of mother nature. We as human beings are able to learn from our environment in more ways we can imagine, it starts from simple try-and-error moves via copying everything we see to actually applying what we have sucked up before. We will be taught many things by all the people around us and at some point they will put us into institutionalized learning factories which are called “schools”.
But the biggest and most genuine school is life itself, nothing can take away that feeling when you learn something just by getting your hands dirty or into some unknown water. Seeing my daughter trying to touch and grab everything what I'm taking out of my bag tells me what learning is about.
First it needs curiosity and an unforced mind to freely welcome all the lessons each day provides. Nothing is more discouraging than having to sit down to listen while you actually want to explore new territory all on your own.
Let us free our wild side!!
While there should be only that many limits and boundaries as really necessary and as less as possible, we do need to learn that our own freedom will stop as soon as we interfere with the freedom of someone else, that is a lesson most of us learn the hard way. It is an important lesson so alright, fair enough. Life is not all guns and roses, or as we would say in German “Das Leben ist kein Ponyhof” (you could translate is to “Life ain't be a pony farm”).
And when you are little and young, without knowing, you rely on the help of countless other people. Our parents tried to do the best to protect us of mishaps and accidents, telling us to stop grabbing that pot of boiling hot water, not because the like abusing their natural given power as parents but to safeguard us wherever they could.
I do believe most teachers in institutional schools have the best intentions, it is often the system itself which restrains them and forces them too to think within narrow boundaries. There are certainly some basic subjects everybody should study but otherwise wouldn't it be great if children could determine by themselves at what time and what pace they want to do or learn things?
How long will kids be allowed to be just kids? Forcing our adorable bundles of energy to stop going their own way and follow their own thoughts just for the means of having a lesson or class sounds so contradictory, aren't they already taking part in the greatest lesson ever? LIFE !
I don't have the answer for those questions and I'm glad I don't have to come up with anything right now. For the moment I can still enjoy the state I'm in right now, and moreover I have found a new teacher myself. Being with my daughter is like having some lessons in life appreciation, so often it is the little things which makes us smile and burst into laughter, pure genuine laughter derived out of the joy of being alive.
So far I have only been a parent for less than a year and a half but I'm already starting to get into that mood where I miss certain things my little daughter used to do before. Therefore I can't help to be selfish and hope she would just take her time to grow up and stay that little and innocent as possible.
Seeing her right now, nibbling on her teether is telling me that life is good and everything is alright. If this is all what matters for her at the moment I'm having no objections.
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@maxinpower
Well, my newborn son is just 3 weeks old and I'm certainly already wondering about the same question about how fast I want him to grow up. Honestly, there's a part of me that wants him to be the best version of myself. In a sense, I want him to grow up faster than I did to better compete in this fast pace world. Then again, he's not even 1 month old. I guess it's always better to let kids be kids. :D
If the world is fast,let us slow down. I understand your feeling towards trying to get the best for him, but let him decide when he is ready. Offer him some possibilities and show him what life offers and what life can be. But I guess we also need to accept if they want to take their time, at least to some extent..
"And when you are little and young, without knowing, you rely on the help of countless other people. Our parents tried to do the best to protect us of mishaps and accidents, telling us to stop grabbing that pot of boiling hot water, not because the like abusing their natural given power as parents but to safeguard us wherever they could"
All our parents intentions has always been for our good, I wished I knew at that time.
I have to disagree with you, some parents don't have good intentions about parenting. talk to the ones medicating their kids anti-kid pills, the ones that hit them to control them with fear and keep them quiet, the ones that dump them in front of TV's, not every parent have good intentions, making you a parent doesn't make you a good person. You have to earn respect from your kids and that comes with patience self- determination and love.
Not every good person is a good parent, I have to agree
yes, we could even say that not every good person is a parent.
Yes when we are earlier we can't or don't want to understand that
we always love our childhood life,,,,,,,,because we do everything without fear ,,,,,but time to time just change our life style .........
Some kids never grow up! I don't want to lose my inner child. I want to be inquisitive and learn as much as I can. It's too late to keep the child like innocence, but I think children need to keep this for as long as possible. Let children follow the beat of their own drummer! They'll grow up when they want to.
Your inner child is one of the most precious things to keep. As older we get as more do we tend to hide it. I wrote some little post about a a few weeks ago
https://steemit.com/photography/@maxinpower/release-the-hidden-child-in-you-the-reward-will-be-priceless-mal-wieder-das-kind-im-manne-rauslassen-es-gibt-nichts-wertvolleres
And you are right, children should decide their own pace, life is already fast enough so we should push them any faster
How long ? As long as parents stop interfering with their own understanding of parenting and put themselves between the kids and the world they explore.
I'm working on unschooling myself, unlearning the pressure that others have put on education. What we think is worth teaching, is sometimes just a pile of old restricted thinking, been carried forward from institution's that believed there is a "way" to teach kids.
As a result of that a lot of adults now are just big kids trapped in an adult body.. By pushing kids to become adults too quickly, we bury their childhood which is then incomplete and stop us making that transition and allowing us to grow. A lot of adults are stuck in that teenage mentality.
how many woman have seen trying to hodl to their teens by how they dress, and interact with one another ? how many men over 30 are stuck in a child's mind when it comes to relationship or trying to speak to women ?
By not letting our kids be kids, we preventing them from maturing naturally, we passively watch schools and social media turn them in to servants of the system, smart enough only to run the machines.
In my opinon it is best to let our children make mistakes and focus more on working on ourselves, to stay calm even if things gets crazy sometimes, give kids the freedom they need, to foreseen that one day they will make a healthy change from childhood to an open minded adult. Carrying within them, the understanding that children are the forefathers of men.
Nicely said, it is important to really live our childhood without being pushed to fast. Showing them directions and possibilities is one thing, but let them decide which road they want to walk
Life teaches just a sparents and teachers do, notneverything is meant to be force fed..
We all love to be child once a life, no matter in what stage you are. The childhood carries a lot of good memories and cute experiences. When a child grown up,many lessons a child learned from the life.
Perceiving the world with the open eyes of a child is to see the world with curiosity, wonder and untainted by preconceived notions.
Wouldn't it be nice if we as adults could be like that? Even just for one day!?
Meditation and psychedelics^^